I didnt mean to Fall in LOve but I Did.

2011-09-19T15:24:00.002+08:00

so am suppose to be studying today but am down sick. really nt fated to study huh!! LOL this bipolar weather -.- okay a wkend flashback which was quite fun(:

Friday

being a nice gf instead of making bf drive all the way to my place to pick me up, i took a train to yck n he picked me up thr. then we headed back to his hse n had a lil quick bite. we babysitted the 2 lil kiddies cuz the adults all went out. then he left me alone wif them to pick shaun n ry up. back home n they had dinz then we left for amk for our movie.

caught johnny english wif bf, lester n serene while shaun n ry watched a lil bit of heaven. our movie was epic! omg laughed till i almost died but i swear i wanted to hit a few children cuz they were bloody noisy!!! so after our movie we met up wif shaun n ry again. bf, shaun n i headed to gardens n met up wif darren n we went over to happy daze. dam tts when craziness started!!!

we ordered a tower n drank it pretty fast n mr darren suggested we order another one -.- so we had 2 towers among 3 of us cuz bf needed to drive me home later. so we 3 were pretty much high!!! hahaha all the nonsense talk n omg my ears almost bled!!! the most epic nite would be something very stupid we did!! HAHAHAHAHA

Saturday

bf came to pick me n mochiboy up cuz we wanted to head to the pet farms n see some dogs! but becuz the weather was being a bitch, we couldnt go :( man i was so stoked!! so we had a lil lunch at bf's then lester n serene came over deciding whr we should go. n becuz mocha kept crying as we tried to leave him we decided to send him back to my place then headed down to town to meet them.

the usuals in town... walk walk eat, window shop. a must go place every time bf n i go to town is Candylicious! haha we go nuts over candies. n then we went shoe hunting for bf n he finally decided to change his shoes!! haha so i bought him his shoes, went to the games store to buy another rock band game n headed to bedok 85 for dinz whr darren, shaun n ry met us thr.

so bedok 85 is famous for his ba chore mee so we had tt n really it isn't all tt. dam overrated pls! after dinz headed back to bf's to play the new rock band game n we played till 3.30am!!! even had time for macs supper! lol so much for my diet..-.-

ok so only words cuz i havnt been taking much pics. shall do so this wkend!!! this is a MUST!

2011-09-16T13:35:00.004+08:00

if u noe me as a fren, I've always LOVED animals (esp dogs n cats) n i really DETEST people who abuse their pets! I've also been so head strong over this matter tt i really do wish i can bring up the awareness of animal abuse in our society today. thr has been an uproar in animal abuse cases recently (apparently this yr has an increase of 15% since last yr) n this shouldn't be happening at all!!! i mean come on, hw can anyone bear to hurt these cute lil fury animals wif such pitiful eyes!!!? OMG i really get dam upset when i read animal abuse cases! i cry more over animals than humans okayyyy!!

studying psychology, i did a small lil research last sem for skool on animal abuse. y do serial killers exists? well the most notorious serial killers in the US had a history of animal abuse when they were young n y they evolve into serial killers is becuz they get bored of animals n hence move on to humans!! many statistics hav proven this!!

in the US n Aus, i noe tt special animal rescue departments are set up in the police itself to help catch animal abusers. nt only do they catch them, they are charged wif nt only a fine but jail terms!!! in sg, so far as i noe, only fines are given to animal abusers n i think its nt enough!! a jail sentence should be applied! these special police officers also nurse the animals back to health n find warm families to adopt them! this is wat sgp needs!!

I'm always up to date abt animal abuse cases in our country cuz i joined all the pet shelters groups on fb! (u should too!!!) n yesterday i came across this poor lil doggie.

(picture taken frm hopedogrescue.blogspot.com)

this poor lil doggie is a miniature schnauzer!! n fyi white schnauzer are quite hard to find in sg! those stupid scums locked this poor baby up in a toilet for 6mths n conveniently "FORGOT" abt the dog so they did nt feed him or even give him water!!!!! WTF IS WRONG WIF THESE ASSHOLES!? worse of all, the guy owner is a police man? wat kind of example are u setting to our people!!? tt animal abuse is okay!? to hell wif u people seriously! oh n they were nt evn remorseful at all when they were found out! so wat made them mistreat this poor lil baby? becuz they were expecting a child!

most people give up their pets jus becuz they hav a child. i mean hello!? the dog or cat has been wif u waaayyyy be4 u even get married or even hav a child! the poor pet has always been so loyal n thr for u when ur upset or happy n nw simply abandon it cuz of a child!? n u decide to abandon the pet be4 ur stupid child is born n u dun even noe whether he or she is allergic to pets so y give up the animal!? thrs no legit reasons for abandoning ur pet!! n if u already noe ur expecting n dun want the pet, y can't u give it up for adoption at a much earlier stage instead of mistreating n starving it!? GAH IM SO MAD!!!!!

but am glad tt an investigation is filed against these assholes! people jus dun get tt karma is a bitch! 1 day u abandon ur pet, next thing u noe ur child will abandon u n dump u in a nursing home!!! HA

read more abt this poor lil doggie at http://hopedogrescue.blogspot.com/2011/08/irresponsible-pet-owner.html n also he's up for adoption!! any kind hearted person who has the time n attention to give to him?

what goes around comes around bitches!!!

2011-09-13T16:16:00.003+08:00

so am back to blogging again! am really trying my best to blog on a regular basis!!!

anyways back track to july 1st! hahaha... me n bf's 1 1/2yrs!! n we headed to sentosa for fun... went to Azzura n shit i ordered some raspberry margarita which was overflowing like mad n i had to drink it uber fast tt i got mad high!! HAHAHAHAA. note to self: NEVER drink frozen drinks under the hot sun!!!!

then we headed to marche for dinz whr darren met us too! simple day but nevertheless i still had fun wif my love(:

so this is my silly dong. he looks kinda drunk (passed out)rite? HAHAHA well.. k tts our secret! this is the day whr we had sukiyaki at my place wif my sis, bf, darren, zx, chloe, rouyu n xinyan! fun fun times... eating heaps!!!!

my 2 cutesies in my life(((: mad lovesssss

the day we recorded Brunch Crunch 2! n we happen to walk pass those turn turn machines n gosh i got obsessed!!! i knew i had to get these rings! so ever since tt day I've been gg around hunting for turn turn machines n each time i turned the machine.. i got a diff ring! (scroll below to see my other 2 rings! LOL)

so last fri i finally went to hav a facial at NY skin solutions n omg i was disgusted by my yucky face!! cuz they did an in-depth skin analysis for me be4 doing my treatment n dam the amt of gross yucky stuff in my skin is mad gross!! so after my facial i felt so refreshed n clean! but lying thr for 2 1/2 hrs was no joke! i really hate facials cuz of the lying thr motionless for such a long time! i start to get agitated n annoyed!! the price to pay for beauty -.-

i took a train down to yck whr bf picked me up n we headed back home. bf's mum jus came back frm bkk n she was so sweet to buy me a top n a skirt-shorts(: had dinz thr.. (oh did i mention tt every time I'm craving for a particular food, his mummy will somehow cook it wifout knowing! haha some applies to my mumsie n paps too! its like they noe my stomach!) so tt nite i was craving for fish soup n she made fish soup n noodles! the only home cook meal i hav is when I'm at bf's. so i tend to over eat! HAHAHA

so bf n i got "kicked out"of the hse. k nt really but becuz his parents were having cell so we had to go out. went to united square for sogurt n i saw my turn turn machine again!! hahaha this time i got a dumbo ring(: walked around aimlessly cuz united sq is so dam boring but we had no whr to go!! so we decided to leave n call darren to meet us at gardens. so liquid kitchen we went. then lester called n he joined us too! our usual wkend plans are either lazing at home or heading to Ron's or gardens for drinks -.-

n this was jus last saturday... whr my sis n i took th 2 dogs (mochi n trax) for grooming a ridge wood. headed to queensway cuz my sis needed to buy sports shoes.. then flew over to suntec n yea i got another ring! HAHAHAHA.

so after suntec, we headed back to the groomers whr bf met me thr to pick our handsome boy up! he always gets so excited to see us when we leave him at the groomers! he will start whining n crying! hahaha. then we popped by to Ron's to get our usual ciders n headed to tpy n met up wif lester, serene, dexter n huiqi. they went grocery shopping for our impromptu bbq later tt nite. oh n darren joined us too(:

so me n lester did all the bbqing tt nite n gosh i felt like a weigh as much as an elephant after tt nite! played rock band as usual after n i was mad poofed out after tt but i still had to drive my ass home. bf has finally trust me wif my driving tt he fell asleep while i drove n he had mocha boy lying on him n he also fell asleep! they looked so cute!!!

my bf thot he was cute. he hanged his hse keys on my Pandora n he said "nah u got a new charm"

-.-

my handsome boy(:

yeps i was EXHAUSTED!

so jus yesterday i went for a job interview. slogged my ass all the way to iluma but am glad i got the job! am kinda stoked since i hav NEVER had a proper job at all! like even in perth when i worked at Dominoes, it was for 2hrs!? LOL so am kinda looking forward to start work in oct(:

took a train back to yck n bf picked me up n headed back to his place for dinz wif his fam. didn't hav an appetite to eat so i only had salad! LOSE WEIGHT PLAN!!!!

ok so i shall try to upload my Brunch videos nw on my blog! but its up on my fb already! (:

till next time when i feel like blogging! LOL

2011-09-08T22:22:00.002+08:00

so today i officially started on my stats revision n omg I'm in sooooooo much pain!!!! gah :( its the most difficult n annoying sub ever!!! whoever invented stats seriously doesn't hav a life! OMG y make everyone suffer when u dun hav a life!!!?

anyways these few days hav been all abt reflection for me. Im really blessed to hav an amazing bf, baby girl n bestfren! if u must noe... my life was mad topsy turvy be4 i left for perth when i was 14... i cried day n nite be4 i left cuz i was miserable. every of my church bros n sis would noe y. tt must hav been the toughest time of my life. but frm tt it really made me grow. my move to aus was a gd one cuz i met my baby girl bestfren n other amazing guys n babes! they made me see things i nv saw be4... created absolutely amazing memories... n my guys supported me through a messed up r/s too. they always wondered y i hung on for so long. n up to nw i find myself stupid for even taking all tt shit. but frm tt.. it too made me grow as a person.

i came back when i was 16 all becuz of 1 person whom rite nw gives me goosebumps jus thinking abt those times. however, i dun regret coming back. cuz i met my twin in jcu who's also supported me through my messy times again (i seem to get myself into a lot of trouble! lol) but becuz of all this trouble i get myself into, my frens play such an important role in my life(: they hav nv left me to deal wif everything on my own.

so when i came back, my life was hectic n dramatic. i guess tts wat every 16-17yr olds go through aye! i was partying so much... getting drunk on a wkly basis, oh n nt forgetting becuz of my partying met 1 of my babes who also hav supported me. we would party every wk together n hav so much fun together! will nv forget all those silly things we used to do! hahaha in the midst of all the partying, i happened to bump into 1 of my really old frens who was very impt to me but we lost contact wif each other during my move. am thankful we met again cuz we managed to be even better frens than we were be4. in fact he's 1 of my bestfrens nw! (n no one would ever guess it will be this person! HAHA)

n after all tt crazy partying, i met my current love of my life all thxs to a few crazy frens! haha... n I'm crazily in love wif him cuz he's so understanding n jus the sweetest. but I've looked at my life n am really happy to whr i hav come. all the people I've met, all the memories i created... none i regret. even those bad ones, though i wish i had made better decisions but am still glad i went through them cuz it made me who i am today. tt explains 1 of my inks.

i jus wanna thank everyone (all the ex bfs, girlfrens, guyfrens) who has played a role in my life 1 way or another. wifout u guys, i won't be who i am today n my life wouldn't hav been so interesting! hahaha

just a penny of my thoughts...

n wif this.. i end with... the heartbreaks and tears... made me...

2011-09-07T16:57:00.006+08:00

I've decided to go back to blogging and will def try to blog on a regular basis. y? cuz i happen to be revisiting memories of mine via my old blogs n realize hw much i actually forgot frm my past but my blog posts frm the past triggered some memories, both pleasant n bad. but i realize hw much i miss those people i used to be close to n nw everyone is at diff places doing diff things tt its so hard to stay connected and it really saddens me.

so I've decided to blog again mainly for personal reasons to make sure i rmb wat i did be4(:

just 2 pictures of the 2 loves of my life...

also, my bf n i hav decided to record videos on the brunch places we go to! curious? view it at my fb profile 1st cuz i seem to be having problems uploading them here n on youtube! hmmm...

so anyways these days hav been quiet. am on study break nw n somehow am unmotivated to study. sigh.. oh wells hav to try somehow. wkends are always wif the boy(: sometimes its lazy days jus lying on the couch n watching random shows, if nt its gg out for brunches, or hanging out at our fav spot: Valle at Ridgewood n its on our 1st brunch video on my fb profile!

yeps... nth much to say as my life is pretty much like this. haha till next time(:

2011-06-14T21:19:00.002+08:00

im finally updating again! omg hw i promised to be active again but im sooooo lazy! even managing my blogshop is taking a toll on me cuz i hate my slow internet connection. making my life so difficult!!

anyways a new update on luvbythumbelina will be on sunday 19th june!! (: havnt decided the time yet but when i hav decided will let yall noe k! cuz i will be launching this upcoming collection while im away in cheenaland! am flying off on friday early morn n this time its more of a biz trip than leisure. so i pray everything goes well!!

oh yes we decided to retake the pics frm the 1st collection as i felt the pics didnt turn out well. wif bad pictures, the clothes also look like shit! so hence we managed to get blogger Zoe Raymond to help us(: so u will be seeing her quite often on luvbythumbelina! until i find another pleasant model. as yall noe i hav veri lil gfs. my ideal model is still vanessa who wont be back till dec! so hopefully when shes back u guys will get to see her((:

ive been a fatty pig eating my guts away these days hence im putting on excess weight!! GAAAHH so angry! k nvm 10 days away in cheena ive decided im purely gg to eat veg n seafood onli! cuz idk wat meat they will give me pls! like i order chicken n they give me dog meat! YUCK YUCK YUCK! this dawned on me eversince the whole dog meat incident in jurong created an outrage! n yes im still upset abt the matter okay!

abrupt end to this post but im getting lazy! OK BYE!

2011-05-10T21:42:00.001+08:00

luvbythumbelina from Sharmaine Koh on Vimeo.

so head over to http://luvbythumbelina.blogspot.com n start shopping babes!!!

any enquiries pls comment at http://formspring.me/luvbythumbelina

2011-05-05T21:47:00.007+08:00

pls help support me!!!! <----- click onto the fb page at the side pls! LOVE U!

2nd vlog make up buys! from Sharmaine Koh on Vimeo.

2011-05-04T17:19:00.002+08:00

we've launched!!!
hey sweets! we hav finally launched our 1st collection! but because our official site is nt up yet... we hav decided to us fb as a temporary source. so head over to facebook... search luvbythumbelina, like our page in order to view the collection and send in ur orders! we apologise for our tardiness in this 1st collection but am really too excited to launch! so pls help spread the word! ur help is much appreciated(:

2011-05-03T16:15:00.003+08:00

award winning cakes baked by urs truly~

ive always LOVED n enjoyed baking. n actually feel tt ive got a flare in it too! (nt tt im hao-lianing but realli okay!) alot of people hav commented tt my cakes are awesome! n its mostly the AUNTIES tt comment okay n yall should noe aunties are the toughest judges ever! n even bf's mum said she wants to start passing me her baking recipes so i can bake wif her esp during cny! she makes AMAZING pineapple tarts btw! LOL so anyways here are 2 of my cakes i baked recently n its the bestest cakes ive done(: banana cake and oreo cheesecake!

the oreo cake was dam gd tt my boys specially drove up to my place jus to devour it! and the banana cake was baked for 1 of my mum's gathering wif her frens n they all loved it! i baked it again too cuz my sis requested it n its waayyy nicer than the 1st time (n the 1st time was already awesome enough!)

so anyways i may be taking orders for my cakes! but onli frm frens who noe me personally. if yall are interested u can email or contact me at yukimi_11@hotmail.com or http://formspring.me/foeshitzme

ive done butter cake (buttery goodness and u dun feel the guilt at all!), marble cake, carrot cake (the english one), yogurt lemon zest cake (which is lovely n light esp for the tangy lovers!) rice krispy snacks, chocolate fudge cake. if yall want other cakes u can jus request and i will try my best to bake them(: so let me noe k!

its a wet tues n ive been so lazy since i started my study break on thurs nite. must realli get down to studying tmr!

ps.. im gonna do a preview on my blog for my shop! so do keep a look out if u wanna noe wats coming up! trust me u wont want to miss our debut launch!

2011-04-29T11:13:00.002+08:00

why i decided to come back to cyberspace!

Untitled from Sharmaine Koh on Vimeo.

so here are the links whr u can find me and ask me more abt my new blogshop(:

http://twitter.com/foeshitzme
http://formspring.me/foeshitzme

I will be posting up my blogshop link and watever next wk as soon as its done up k! so do keep a look out!

2010-12-04T01:46:00.008+08:00

marriage is the union of two hearts that become one... beating in synchrony as one
yea i noe i looked hell shag n pale. n yes i was okaayyy! i did nth but i was mega poofed out! imagine wif onli 7hrs of sleep n standing around smiling to all of bf's uber big family of relatives... yea u will look like me trust me! n this was onli after 5hrs! idk hw i pulled through till the dinz man!swear this pic looks like frm those ikea, courts catalogue of kids playing on the bed! mad cute niece n nephew of bf's!darren was jo's personal horse! LOL leanne was mad cute! she stood rite in front of my camera n wanted me to take the pic for her! LOL bf's other niece! we both predict she will grow up into a mega pretty girl!! these 2 were mega cute! kept dancing n gg crazy when the electroish music started playing!awww SO CUTE RITE!

n heres my cutie bf who abandoned me in sg over this wkend to go viet wif his boys! PUI la u! im mad bored its nt even funni! all i wanna do is eat when im bored!!? geeezzz... ur NEVER ALLOWED to leave me here ever again!!!! so yes im crying in boredom nw! ive watched 3 episodes of ANTM... vamp diaries, 90210 n glee!! crazy shit but seriously im THIS BORED!! suppose to head out wif my homies tonite but we decided on tmr nite instead since tonite thrs pretty much nth happening! so yeppers im stoked for tmr nite cuz i get to hang wif my fav people i havnt seen in a while n then by the time i leave the club... few hrs later bf will be back! WHEEEE =D yea its crazy hw inseparable we are! but cant help it hes my life n wifout him i feel so aimless pls! yea exactly like nw! so ITS ALL UR FAULT tt im feeling so miserable, lonely n fat nw cuz all i do is eat when im bored!? geeezzz...

idk hw many of yall are still reading this dusty space but if yall want instant updates on my days n all jus follow my on twitter!! foeshitzme im a twitter whore i swear! i tweet almost every minute of my life! oh n u can ask me questions on my formspring.me/foeshitzme keep me entertained plsss!

k i noe y im so bored! i finished my report in 2 days! yea i noe i still gotta study n all but aiya lazzyy!

shall hit the sack nw since my 2 precious furball babies are already KOed on my bed. 1 on my lap n the other at the foot of my bed! BYYYEEEE

2010-12-01T01:30:00.003+08:00

11 mths n still growing...

we are 11mths old baby!!! 1 more mth n we will be celebrating our 1 yr anniversary!! cant wait cuz it marks hw far we hav come over this yr! many ups n downs but we always make it out stronger and more in love wif each other. this whole mth has been crazy drama for me n im so thankful tt u are always by my side comforting me n giving me strength to carry on wif my life. idk wat i will ever do wifout u. n within this mth we both celebrated each others' bdays!! we hav had our fair share of nasty fights but its all part n parcel of being in a r/s. n baby its okay tt our outings hav lessened. i do love lazing at home wif u pigging out or watching tv or driving around random places. compromises hav to be made in order for a successful r/s to work out. n im always willing to do anything for u baby. n when i whine n cry abt wanting something.. u always spoil me n make me happy by meeting to my demanding requests n also surprising me in everyway u can. i hav nth more to say but a big I LOVE U! im so glad n thankful u are mine! forever n ever we are nv leaving each other

tts 1 pic frm bf's sister's wedding on saturday taken by his bro in law. tts the dress i wore for the dinz tt bf surprised me wif on 1 of my our days out mths ago. i was looking for maxi dresses n we chanced upon this 1 at wisma n was abt 100 plus n i refuse to buy it at tt point of time. but bf knew hw much i loved it n he disappeared for a while saying he was gg to the toilet while i was at forever 21 browsing around n he came back wif it! hes the sweetest i swear(: bf said tt saturday nite prepping for the dinz n all felt like prom! LOL veri true actually!

tmr's plan: head to skool for results interpretations... either head to coffeebean at amk or bf's hse to continue on my research report. then dinz wif bf n his fam.. yogurt at gardens!! heehee x) yogurt at nite always ends a day well am i nt rite!!!? k off to bed i gooooo. research report to rush out by this wkend. i can do it!! pls dun hav writers block!! grrrrr

Bf's sister's wedding day

2010-11-27T13:18:00.001+08:00

Currently in the car while Bf is driving n his mummy in the front seat making our way to the church for his sister's wedding. Crazy mad day in the morning. Went to his place for the tea ceremony thingy n gosh tts so complex! All the ranking n all to serve tea. Wah I didn't Noe thr was a sequence n all. Mingling wif his fam was quite stressful. I felt like I was getting scanned in their heads mentally! Met abt 90% of his fam in tt short 1hr. So thrs nw the church wedding n then the dinz tonite Marriott hotel! My fav part has got to be the wedding cake! Heeeheeee k will update again later! Happy Saturday!

Ps... I shall start creating a scrap book of my dream wedding like wat Anne Hathaway n kate Hudson did in Bride Wars! Heeeheeee

Sleepless nite

2010-11-25T02:33:00.001+08:00

Having trouble sleeping n idk y :( n it's nt becuz I changed a new bed. I guess the lil monsters in my head jus won't shut up n stop running wild. Too much gg on recently tt it's so difficult to sleep wifout taking drowsy medicines tt will make me' sleep faster n better. I feel like a robot realli. A dysfunctional one. Rite nw beside me' I've got the cat snoring away n at my feet the dog using my leg as his pillow on doggie land too. I wish I can fall asleep easily like them.

So my bed came today n gosh I realli HATE dealing wif PRCs!!! 1stly my Chinese sucks n they are fking argumentative people! Geezzzz I was so pissed jus nw but I couldn't hurl any vulgarities since my chinese is is atrocious! gotta wake up at 9ish tmr later on cuz the painter is coming to paint my walls pink! N fri my wardrobe n shelve comes in n tt completes my new rm which I gave a make over(: my rm will then feel more comfy n safe for me' to retreat to every time I feel like crap.

Havnt seen Bf in 5days already n I can seriously die :( Esp nw tt I'm so pmsy n emotional I cry like a baby when I'm angry n Water works begin when I'm upset. I'm so much more sensitive nw! Sighh cant wait for this wkend cuz it's bf's sister's wedding. At least something to boost my optimism levels since lately I'm like the worlds most pessimistic person ever. Tt love still exists n tt marriage is a blissful n happy time of a person's life.

Revelation today... In ur eyes I value lesser than tt hoebag. So hoebag 1 me 0. Thxsss

Skool

2010-11-22T13:36:00.001+08:00

In skool nw having stats tut. I'm so bored n so resulted in the pics above. Taking 2 subs onli this sem but yet skool is still such a chore! I wanna go away! U hav no idea hw much I need a dam break nw! Tt aside... Realli can't wait for Bf to get his car. Tt means lesser public transport for me'(((((:

Presentations nw. I'm laughing at hw chill n unprepared we are so tt means we are gd thinkers on our feet! Jus gonna blabber waterer nonsense tt comes into my mind. I'm freezing n cold!

K I realize hw disorganized my thots are when I blog! K dun mind me since I havnt blogged jn ageeesssss!

I miss u Bf! Byeeee

On the go 2- to ikea!

2010-11-21T15:20:00.001+08:00

Otw to ikea to get furniture for my rm(; the new bed is coming on thurs n in totally stoked to redo my whole rm! Am suppose to hav pink stripe walls but putting tt on a whole till mumsie comes back n paint it for me. Trying to make me' rm a more homie n comfy feeling! The transformation shall so the trick(:

It's a boring Sunday! I'm forever the lazy potato! Oh wells n bf is uncontactable! Tt lazy bum must still be sleeping! Pfftttt

I'm such a boring person it ain't funni! Puiiii

On the go 1

2010-11-21T02:18:00.001+08:00

Currently blogging via Liam my new iPhone4(:

Jus testing out the connection since I havnt blogged in ageeesssss! Well if I can get this uploaded I promise more posts since I can blog on the go nw(:

Veri boring n pointless post but yea.

I love sat nites wif my Bf. He's the cutest I swear! We would break out into random dances when a gd song plays. He's such a kid I can't help but squeeze him all the time! My cutest baby everrrrrr! I love u pooooooo

2010-11-10T03:50:00.003+08:00

despite all this crap i gotta go through and feel right now...

the love of my life keeps me sane. cuz when im upset, he will do a crazy "angry" dance (he likes to call it crumping) n shake his butt like thrs no tmr n then i will join in wif him n dance all the pain away. i love you so much baby! thxs for standing by me through all the hard times.

2010-11-10T02:50:00.002+08:00

ive been avoiding blogging cuz i noe then i hav to face up to my fears n truth abt my whole life nw. ive been trying to handle some issues recently.. im trying so hard to put on a brave front n numb all my feelings. i realli wish i was a vampire. tt way i can nv feel n hide my emotions so well frm others. on day 1 of (i shall call it...) "the explosion", i caved in telling my bros n kerry. n obviously the bf was the veri 1st to hear me wailing over the fone. feeling so helpless hes the onli one i can talk to but he will nv underst wat is gg through.. wat I am gg through cuz his life is totally opp to mine. as depressed as i was.. i hanged on as long as i could. when i was out in public.. i teared occasionally even when i was listening to 'perfect nightmare' by shontelle. k normally this song would make me laugh hysterically cuz i will always think abt the veri 1st time when i heard this song, bf broke into this random crazy dance which made me laugh so hard! for once.. no "happy song" could cheer me up. n when i told my bros abt it... n they came over to hug me.. i jus balled my eyes out. i was at freakin starbucks damit! so we decided to take a drive to marina barrage n screw studying for tt day since we were all upset. we landed up at haji for dinz n shisha n realli talking abt it. i felt pain again. this time was harder since thr was onli 1 person tt came into my head the whole time n onli 1 aim.. hw to protect the ones i love? i struggled wif my emotions n pain for many days. even up to nw it still hurts. idk hw i can withstand all this already. cuz every moment bring around tt perosn irks me.. repulses me.

all along i must say im blessed. im always surrounded by people who love, care n protect me. im pampered at home n even when im out wif frens. im always the baby of the bunch. n being so used to it i often take it for granted. but thr was always part of me tt wished deep down i had a different life... different environment. i was always jealous of others. but yet i noe thr will be others who are jealous of me. cuz i grew up always getting wat i want. i will whine n cry to my parents till i get wat i want. yea call me spoiled but this was hw my parents showed me hw much they love me. jus today i received my iPhone 4 n 2k plus to re-do my whole rm. n jus last wk i mentioned to my dad tt i want the iPhone 4 n i got it today. yes im blessed... materialistically. but wat abt r/s wise? its always been a question mark for me. cuz im always jealous of others.

im battling wif all sorts of emotions nw. it hurts me so much when i noe so much but yet i can onli sit here writing my emotions n feelings wifout having any ability to protect the ones i love. i feel weak n useless. for once in my life i dun wanna be protected but i wanna do my part to protect others.

my bf, furball son n sister has been my pillar of support through this whole "explosion". sometimes i bet my bf thinks im bipolar. cuz i can be so happy when im wif him but once he hugs me.. i jus grab him so tight n cry on his shoulders until hes drenched in my tears. then to make me feel better.. he will do a crazy dance or tiger pounce n i will laugh. he realli noes hw to pamper n comfort me.

but u noe i jus feel its so unfair. i hav enough on my plate already n yet all this must happen. like it my whole life jus destined to deal wif crap n get all upset n affected by everything tt i lose all focus n direction in my life? when something falls apart in my life.. i get flustered, get frequent anxiety attacks, lose my concentration n motivation. so u tell me hw am i suppose to be focusing on my skool work?! im jus a kid who turned legal n i should be onli worrying abt skool work, assignments n exams. nt all these other crap! u noe hw suffocating n stressful all this feels?! i go to bed crying almost every nite. i wake up wif puffy eyes n a pale face. i look so shag.. im losing appetite.

i need strength to move on wif my own life. i need comfort. i need remedies to make me feel better. i need to learn to get numb n used to all this. i need to stop crying. i need to stop hurting. i need to learn tolerance n nt explode. i need to find ways to protect those i love. i need to stop feeling so suffocated by all this.

i cant do this anymore. i wanna quit this life.

2010-11-03T00:20:00.003+08:00

my life is a sad sad routine ever since skool started last wk. wake up.get dressed.skool.lectures or tutorials.laugh laugh laugh wif my bros n get bullied.home.dinz.tv.research on my assignment.tv.call bf.sleep. sighhhhh me no likey being a student, but at least ive got something to do to kill time. n my this sem is quite slack. wed n thurs off((: shiiookk! but saturday morning lect -.- oh n thrs icecream chef rite behind my skool!!! WHOOOOO =D n me, isk n xavier jus discovered a new bar wif reasonable priced drinks! so mon we had a lunch break be4 social psych lec n we decided to check tt place out. ordered 4 pints of beer n knowing im such a bad beer drinker.. i was high! high n i went for lect! LOL EPIC! but those 2 clowns behind me were more crazy than me!? keep flipping me upside down n flipping my chair -.- CRAZZYYYY

anywhos... realli miss bf so much! realli cant wait for friday's public holiday!! planning a lil sentosa trip jus becuz i REALLI WANNA go Candylicious!!! wanna see the halloween candy be4 it goes off the shelves! heehee sucker for seasonal candy!!!

jus 2 pics frm bf's bday. cuz i suddenly miss my twin!

omg watching this hk drama n this hk guy is dam hot!! shall google him nw! n he reminds me of bf esp in his thai boxing shorts!! heeeheeeee =D

2010-10-29T20:52:00.004+08:00

its jus me n my dog on a friday nite

yeppers ive been home the whole day! out sick wif my allergies acting up cuz the cat slept wif me n the dog last nite on my pillow. breathing her fur into my nose jus clogged up my nose n made things so bad for me in the morning. wanted to press on n got changed to go to skool but my eyes were watery, puffy n my nose all red like rudolf so i decided to jus stay home n bed rest all day((:

n bf has some deepavali event thingy in camp at nite so im home in front of the lappy camwhoring wif my furball son who has been annoyingly naughty these days! grrr.. peeing on the couch like for the 1st time!? omg i was soooo angry n jus when i was gg to meet my bros to discuss our assignment!

yay so bf jus called((: hate hw his camp has like no reception!!? so basically frm 9am to 5pm hes like uncontactale. so when he gets home i always feel happy to hear his voice!

k i shall go get to shower. n nw the question is... to Halloween or nt to Halloween tmr??! hmmmm...

2010-10-27T01:41:00.004+08:00

if yall hav been following my twitter... ive been ranting n getting all pissy abt wat frens i hav these days. well obviously i noe ive got a handful tt i can count on n these are mostly the guys! the girls are jus disappointing!!! like wth!? i wont go into detail wat has been gg on but this is jus another reason y i choose n hav more guy pals or bros than girlfrens. cuz girls jus simply cant be trusted! ive been peeved for quite a number of days. as in nt like i hav nv noticed this pattern be4 in my frens but i guess recently it has become more prominent n it also happened to my bf too! so i guess both of us hav come to a point whr we both dunno who realli are our frens tt got our backs n who will keep to their promises in a frenship. sometimes i jus feel tt such people arent worth my time or anger at all. but being me.. i always over-think things n if u realli do noe me nth is more impt than my frens. like if u need me to listen to u rant over a terrible bf or a bad break up or gossip mongers.. u noe i will def drop watever i am doing n loan u my ears n time. but y cant yall do tt for me? like i feel most of my frenships wif my girls are all 1 sided. like its always me whos thr for u but ur nv thr for me?

wat makes me feel worse is tt my bf hasnt been able to listen to my rants recently since hes so drained after work n all he jus wanna sleep n rest n our fone calls are cut down to its minimum. also noe wif his 'save $ for my vroom vroom' plan, meeting each other is also cut down too esp during the wkdays. k la but i noe im nv alone as long as i hav my baby wif me. or at least i hav our furball son to "fill" in for him until hes free to talk to me.

apart frm all this.. skool jus started. 2nd day n ive already missed tutorials but becuz i was sick okaayy! omg jus thinking abt this makes my blood boil but my skool is a total BITCH ASS i tell u! fking 2hrs of drilling when im having lecture jus rite next to the dam lecture hall. like seriously wtf!!? are yall so stupid!!? so u can imagine us battling wif the dam drilling n being forced to concentrate on the lecture. yea i walked out having a bad ass headache tt knocked me out the whole nite! geezz tts like 1 more reason added to my 101 hates abt my fking STUPID N RETARDED skool! k seriously.. DUN EVER STUDY AT JCU singapore!!
(fking still resent tt shit for manipulating my mind to coming back! yea i could hav been in UWA okay bitch! k but watever at least i found the love of my life while i came back!(:

k but apart frm my skool being the totally suckish skool on the entire planet... i met some pretty awesome people! so tts the ONLI plus point to my skool! k 1 day i shall list down a few reasons y one should NEVER enrol into my skool!!!

im hungry as im typing this. guess i better head to bed! my rents hav been on my case lately abt me sleeping so late n blah blah blah cuz of my low BP n wat nt. oh n so is my bf! toooddllleesss!

ps.. i miss this boy hell alot :( n its ok if we dun hav frens! cuz at least we noe we hav each other! so suck on tt world!! frens?! PUI! my asssssss!
pss.. ive unlocked my twitter acc! <--- so start following me again!!!

2010-10-25T22:36:00.002+08:00

on 23rd october.. just 2 wks after i turned 18.. my bf turned 23!! =D

bbq bday celebration for my babyboy. n i got him a yummy tumtum choc banana cake!! omg it was sooooo good everyone was raving abt it! =D yay i did a gd job! n im so happy i spent his bday wif him(: i love u so much baby!! my cutie pootsie pie!

2010-10-22T04:07:00.002+08:00

back frm Play. im exhausted n wasted!! as im typing this im headachy!! omg idk hw much shit i drank tonite? k nt alot but like the drinks were quite strong i must say! Play was awesome wif my twin n darren(: had such a blast as its a totally diff scene frm wat im used to (Zirca) n gosh i still had so much fun!!! met alot of new faces, old faces! (: but nevertheless i still am thankful to be wif my bf! dun get me wrong im totally open to the gay scene n im so accepting n rather i LOVE them more than "my own kind"! but jus tt it aint for me!

k i think i better crash like nw? super tired nw! n still gotta wake up for lunchy wif my mumsie n sister later! will post pics up when im nt in this state (high/wasted) BYEEE

2010-10-21T17:27:00.002+08:00

i miss my boy :(
so i havnt seen my boy in 4 days :( its depressing realli. cuz his new work thingy is tiring him out tt i dun even hav time to see him when he finishes work. sigghh k but at least fri n sat nite will be OUR nite. k rather fri(: gg for a french dinz to celebrate his bday. n saturday is whr all our frens come together n celebrate our bday together! cant waittt

anyways today will be a nite out wif twin((: plan is to head to Play but im having this lazy mode. omg maybe cuz skool is starting n its hitting me. i honestly feel like chilling out wif drinks instead of partying partying. oh wells we shall see wat happens when i actually step out of the hse

ive been eating so much yogurt the whole day(: LOVE LOVE YOGURT!! k gonna go watch E! news! byeeee

2010-10-18T02:52:00.004+08:00

i hate wearing metal head bands!!!

friday 15th oct
i was a lazy potato at home((: slept like a pig since bf was too after his work. n this neh neh pork didnt ans my fone n i got a bbm frm darren saying to meet for dinz then drinks at liquid kitchen after. so mumsie dropped me off at bf's hse n luckily he was awake by then. so we drove to pick darren up n headed to gardens for dinz. but bf had a MEGA HUGE BF cuz we couldnt even get parking even at his club so we left for amk n had dodgy steamboat!! omg the hygiene was MORTIFYING!!! OMG OMG! DUN EVER go to shabu shabu at amk hub!! its TERRIBLE!

after dinz it was over to liquid kitchen for some drinks n jerry joined us. simple nite but at least i was out!!!!
i was having mega gastric pains tts y i was so upset :(sunday 17th oct
a veri late day as usual since sleeping seems to be the onli thing i LOVE to do during my hols. then mumsie came home n i woke jiejie n nick up n we headed down to ion to paradise dynasty for their 8 signature xlbs again!! bf met us thr(: it was such a nice dinz. felt like some fam outing!! AWWW (: we had like 4 "longs" of the signature xlbs n trust me i nv get tired of it!! the flavours are sooooo different n exotic unlike the usual pork xlbs at dtf or wat nt. so this is my last wk of hols!! booo :( im kinda wanting to go through the whole studying n rushing assignment phase again but i noe when it begins im gonna say "OMG make it STOP!!" well cant wait to go skool wif the craziest n most enjoyable people in the world(: i miss my bros!! last wk of hols means i better club like mad this wk!! thurs is a date wif my twint to play! n hopefully sat too! oh which reminds me i better post on the fb event wal!! me n bf are having a combine bday celebration on sat wif everyone else n since thr are so many october babies.. its jus a whole big party for the octy kids!! STOKED! cant wait to sink my teeth into the banana choc cake i ordered for the party!

k better head to bed soon! me, mumsie n jiejie were watching desp hsewives jus like good old times(: bummed hw mumsie is leaving on sunday :( oh wells at least she came back!

2010-10-14T03:02:00.002+08:00

how on earth is it possible for 2 complete strangers who hav NEVER crossed paths have the exact same thinking and almost the same words when posting stuffs online!!? odd much!? k its kinda creepy actually...

okay tt aside... mumsie is finally home!! onli for a mere 10 days but it was nice(: i had this whole lil secretive plan to tell my mum we werent picking her up frm the airport since she kept saying she will jus cab home. so we drove down to the airport.. she called me when she landed n i was at coffee bean wif my sister getting a caramel frap. then we went to the arrival hall n she called again "papa isnt picking me up rite?" i said "eh nope!" she went "okay i will jus catch a cab home" i laughed when i put down the fone n told my sister "she doesnt noe we are here!" my sis goes "ur so retarded!" if u dun already noe.. i LOVE surprises! which also means i love surprising others too! seeing my mum's face light up when she saw us was priceless(: my lies worked! HAAAAA

anyways apart frm this.. ive home for 2 days n im gaining alot of weight!! cuz on monday nite bf drove me to the supermarket to stock up my hse.. BAD CHOICE!! nw i noe y my mum n bf HATES gg grocery shopping wif me! i buy nonsense n mainly FATTY NONSENSE!! so ive been eating different snacks every hr!! ritz crackers, honey graham cereal, tuna butter roll, kaya toast, lays bbq chips, OMG SOMEONE CALL ME OUT PLSSSS!! i realise when i party drink n get drunk i lose the MOST WEIGHT!! i dun even eat!! i NEED HELP!!!

hope i see bf tmr! cuz i havnt seen him in 2 days n rarely spoke to him either. hes started his new job n all so less time to call me while hes at work.. let alone ans my calls. booo :( n i wanna drive!!! grrrr oh if yall dunno my bf has been teaching me hw to drive a manual car so i wont be so stupid when i actually get behind the wheel. n i must say its darn fun!! though on the 1st time i screamed n went "FK FK FK!" up to nw my bf goes around telling EVERYONE hw i reacted n wat i said -.- oh wells!

wanted to post a pic but cant find one. k i think im dam recuperating frm my bday wk! so im ready to get drunk n party again! (: n i think ima go start working at _____ next wk! since they say i dun need to be interviewed.. technically im hired? shall text kenneth n find out the details n all! must start training my legs to stand for 8hrs! YEA GO ME! n $ can start rolling in!! WHOOOO =D guess i gotta start when i start skool though. since bf's bday is next sat!

need to stop bloggin n go to bed. but im SOOOO AWAKE! feel like gg running! but thrs like 2 maniac psycho murderers around my hse? 1 at woodlands n another at yishun. pfftt i shall be like an FBI on criminal minds! HAHAHA

k im realli bored n im SOOOO AWAKE!! wat to do at 3am someone tell me!!!?

2010-10-12T02:54:00.005+08:00

i must be the luckiest girl on this planet...

ive got the best boyfren anyone can ask for... who always takes my petty nonsense. encourages me n picks me up when i feel like the shittest person on this planet. n we both noe hw much we cant live wifout each other. n im so happy tt his dad has acknowledged me as his girlfren nw!! (: his dad is jus like my dad so i made some improvements! n his sister n bro-in-law always tell the kids to call me 'aunty' LOL n his mum has been concerned over my health n all. so it is comforting to noe hw accepting n nice his fam is abt us(: makes everything so much easier ya noe! i love u sean yang see jay!
my twin who has watched me grow frm a total mess last yr till wat i am today... n whos bday was yesterday (11th oct) HAPPY BDAY! ive known her for a yr plus n im so glad i met her! n she bought me jaggerbombs on my bday! or rather we always get so drunk together whenever we party! LOL I LOVE U!! n twins for life i sweaarrrr!my sexy babygirl who is ALWAYS here for me too! when i cry she hugs me n tell me to stop.. she comforts me n tells me everything is okay n she will be by my side. n i always hav a ton of fun when im out partying wif her! oh n i kissed her on her lips!! boys be JEALOUS!the bestest bros in this world(: who crashed my place a day be4 our stats paper. we talked till 2am plus abt our lives... skool isnt fun wifout them seriously! n they are so full of nonsense sometimes! always disturbing me but yet looking out for me all the time when we are out together be it in skool or drinking. thxs so much!n my new gbff (which i didnt get to take an indi shot wif!!) im so glad hes so buddy wif my twin!!! they were mad cute i swear!! cant wait for my twin to come back frm perth cuz we all will be hitting PLAY to party like MADDD (:yall made my bday the bestest everrrr! k more bday pics up soon!

went to register for my theory lessons n wat nt today!! (: soon there will be a new driver on the road yo!! gonna attempt to get my license by feb next yr!!! then frm thr persuade paps to get me n my sis a car! WHOOO =D

anyways i had a crazy thot.. if psychology doesnt work out for me i should go be a private investigator! its like im soooo good at digging shit abt people. even if its on purpose or by coincidence! LOL k im totally kidding abt being a PI but realli if u want me to dish out any shit abt a cheating boyfren/girlfren or ex.. or watever.. jus call me man! HAHAHAH

k getting sleepy nw. gonna crash soon n shower the smelly furball son of mine!

2010-10-11T01:19:00.002+08:00

FINALLY legal!!!
was surprised when i walked into my room after my friday bday celebration at zirca n saw 2 big bunches of pink helium balloons. ive got the bestest bf on this planet! n even my mum says he spoils me too much! LOL i told bf i want balloons for my bday n he realli outdone himself! i nt onli got 2 bunches but i even got a big round singing balloon!!! it sings happy bday to me!! OMG FUN SHIT! best bday prezzie eveeerrr!

friday 8th-9th oct
so friday was krrraaaazzzyyyy! met xavier n munirah in town around 5ish.. n they got me krispy kreme donuts back frm the kl trip!! i was MAD HAPPY!! then bf came down to meet us.. n off we headed to cuscaden for some pre-drinks. isk, nigel, yanrui n alwyn came by n off we headed to zirca!

twin n claire met us thr n i was so happy to finally meet the both of them again!! like last yr me n twin celebrated our bday thr too so it was realli significant for both of us! n the bouncers all wished me happy bday n was like "wah FINALLY 18!!" LOL they are MAD CUTE! n darren came along too!!

so we partied till 3ish.. 2 belvedere bottles, 1 champagne, 10 jaggerbomb shots, 2 blowjob shots, 1 waterfall. yea the amt of alcohol we drank was NUTS! n im so happy everyone enjoyed themselves even though some didnt noe each other but alcohol brings everyone together! oh n twin n darren met for 2hrs n they were like bffs by the middle of the nite!! SO CUTE!

saturday 9th-10th oct
lazy day wif bf, jiejie n nick at home. had lunch n dinz at home. jus trying to rest the crazy nite away. then i dropped him home at 9ish n i left for attica to meet my sexy kerry baby for their costume anniversary party. mad crazy party when i had free flow of drinks frm the event n the guys. i sat at the couch eating popcorn! HAHA i left earlier cuz i got tired n went to meet bf. n im glad everything is ok(:

baby all i noe is tt I LOVE U SO MUCH! n i cant thank u enough for my bestest 18th bday eveerrr! i cant imagine my bday wifout u. u jus made everything perfect. n although u onli got me balloons for my bday... they made me soooooo happy! u hav no idea hw much i love the balloons u got me! u saw hw my face lighted up when i saw them. jus like a lil girl on xmas opening her 1st prezzie. i love u baby. thxs for being the bestest bf any girl can hav in this world. n im glad we always talk things out n make everything even better than it was. baby ur the greatest n i love u! oh n our macs breaky((:

overall.. BEST BDAY EVEERR! like 1000000000 times better than last yr!! i guess the company jus makes everything different! thxs for everyone who came by to celebrate my 18th wif me!! bf, twin, darren, claire, xavier, isk, munirah, nigel, yanrui, alwyn, monica, mitchell, luke, the zirca bouncers: kenneth, lester, misuzu n basically everyone else!!

*will upload the rest of the pics later!* for nw i shall sleep n wake up tmr n register for my DRIVING!! WHOOOOO =D

2010-10-07T13:34:00.003+08:00

ladies niteeeeeee

so last nite was an epic crazy nite! ladies nite wif my baby kerry jus like good old times(: n elissa dropped by for a bit for a few drinks. so frm zirca we went to le noir n got treated drinks.. attica's bar whr we got 1 jug of redbull vodka n cranberry vodka.. inside to attica's vip whr we got more drinks n the male models were pouring vodka orange.. upstairs to attica's vip for AGAIN more drinks! n gosh i drank till i pee-ed non stop!! but BEST NITE EVER since a looooonnngggg time! realli like good old times whr me n kerry jus went clubbing together but will bump into people we noe or rather SHE noes n party n drink like mad(: then back to zirca whr we sat n stoned thr... rebel to see the crowd but was like ewww. then we cabbed to bf's place whr we went jalan kayu for prata then he sent us home! (: n my baby tried to drive sean's car but failed!! so im nt the worse driver eveer! HAHAHAHA

though my baby was upset last nite... we ultimately had an awesome nite towards the end(: oh was at zirca be4 our crazy nite began n its so sweet hw all the bouncers rmb my bday is coming!! they all went "ur bday is it!!! finally legal ritteee!" when they saw me! HAHHAA misuzu even wants to hav a "cutting fake id" ceremony for me on friday when i go down! they are sooo cute! n omg i almost fell asleep at attica's vip again last nite!! last yr i slept at attica's bar.. last nite ALMOST did too! omg wats wif me n sleeping at attica!!? must be their drinks n crazy music which make me sleepyyyy

but kinda hate the crowd at zirca nw. alot of weird ones. sigghhh but i love the people thr! attica was fun nevertheless n the people thr are uber nice too! maybe i should make tt my 2nd fav place since kerry practically migrated thr already!

we are gonna make it a point to ladies nite every once a mth nw! jus the both of us like old times since i rarely see her nw n i miss her soooo much!

no pics since we all didnt bring our cams but good memories were made in my brain!!

off to sleep again. meeting best for my bday dinz later! WHOOOO =D

2010-10-05T03:35:00.003+08:00

its 3.35am.. im back to the good old days whr i drown myself wif tw dramas n read the english subtitles if they hav or if they dun.. i will jus roughly make out wat the hell the plot is abt. but its always the same old same old boy meets girl.. they fall in love.. but cant be together.. force to break up.. cry cry cry.. but get back together in the end. yea im a sucker for such shows! well its nice to be in fairytale land once in a while aint i rite girlies?

it was a nice monday i had today. bf being the sweetest kept me company the whole day cuz i hate being alone at home. but he having a recent craze on W.OW. (yea its like dejavu all over again but this time its a diff n better person! HA) brought his lappy over n played for 6hrs!!? i dun get guys n their games but trust me when he 1st started i was whinging n whinning so much i got angry n crazy at him for making me come over his hse n watch him play his stupid game. but somehw today i overcame the crazy angry self n occasionally sat on his lap n watched him play. i fell asleep on my bed for abt an hr or so n he being he sweetest would come in n kiss my cheek. n this furball son of mine too wants the share of the love.. so he happily jumped on my bed n sniffed n licked my cheek. it was a great monday being surrounded by my 2 boys i love so much. we would chase the furball around the hse.. disturb him.. give him tummy rubs.. flip him around... bestest moments are always the simpliest n most blissful(:

then it got me thinking hw lucky i am to hav my bf wif me all the time. its been 9mths n the bestest 9mths of my life! realli my bestest r/s ever out of my 6yrs of dating or watever u wanna call it. to think i actually thot i lovED those dudes in my past life. but dun get me wrong.. ive nv regretted them n in fact im still veri close frens wif ALMOST all of them. occasionally i get random calls frm 1 of them asking hw im doing n if i wanna join them at clubs. to me frenship after a break up is so important. unless i state otherwise. HAAAAAA

k off to continue watching my drama.. then shall call my computer game zombie bf n make sure he sleeps!!!

its a curse to know too much sometimes...

(edit)
i read my old blogs, browsed old pics... n ive seen wat grown n progress i made in my life. esp eversince i came back last yr to nw.. the changes ive made is esp apparent to those whos been thr for me since then till nw. 1 person is def my twin! though we dun need to talk everyday.. we always nv run out of things to catch up on when we do meet up! n each time i see her she always tells me hw proud she is of me for the drastic change since last yr till nw. it amazes her wat 1 person can do to affect n impact my life so much tt ive changed. she recently had a her fair share of life changing moments too. n i truely feel tt thrs a turning point in everyones life. its jus a matter of time till it hits u. either by a person or an event which can change ur thinking n personality. i used to be seen at clubs every wk.. sometimes even 3 times a wk... getting intoxicated n crazy. abnormal sleeping n eating habits. nw im thankful i got my life back on track. i noe wat i wanna be doing in my future.. n who i want in my future. nt jus in terms of marriage life but also those whos supported me through everyday. i cannot thank my bros n babes for always picking me up when i fall. nw ive got sean who is the permanent "life picker" of my life which i will nv trade or give up for anything else in this world. simply put it.. im thankful for everything tt has happened over a short period of 1yr cuz it made me see things differently.. forced me to grow up n treasure people n life better. but more important thankful for my frens, family n bf who always tell me to nv give up n keep on gg. all the emotional n physical support i needed to get me through everything. i love yall so much...

2010-10-04T01:15:00.003+08:00

happy birthday to my mummy dearest!!

sudden craving for the yusheng my mummy makes after seeing this pic!! OMG OMG! n i was so skinny then during chinese new yr plss.. nw im jus a big fat huffalump! PUI

had a nice long fone call wif my mummy jus then(: said all i wanted to say so i shant write anything else here n its private too! i love u mummy.. so so much n i cant wait to see u next wk n go for our spa day!! =D

2010-10-03T20:38:00.003+08:00

deadly sinz

pretty balloons
iPhone 4
bkk trip
perth trip
hk/taiwan trip
cakes/cupcakes
pretty make-up
wedges/clogs/flats
bikini
moet n chandon
shots of jagger bombs
feather
zoukout tics! (omg freakin cant wait!!)
cinnamon rolls
churros
popcorn machine
krispy kreme donuts! (which my bros are gonna buy back for me frm kl!! whoooo)

k mind blank.. im trying to make a list of wat i want/need. but i cant come up wif anything!! like yesterday when bf n i went to town trying to pick my bday prezzie.. nth seemed to appeal to me! i would look at it but then stare at it longer n go.. NAAHHH! even juicy couture my fav sinful brand doesnt make me go OMAAGGAWWDD anymore! is it becuz im getting older n pickier?

k at least i managed to churn out 17 points but even so majority are food? LOL kkeerrraazzyy! n even if i wrote bikini/shoes i dun even noe wat design n wat not. sigghh im such a picky shopper these days!! which i guess its good since at least 70% of my clothes are nt worn n rotting in my closet n i save $ too!

realli realli stoked for wed nite wif my babygirl((: n fri nite too! cuz my cutie face boy has something up his lil sleeve n my bros are in on the plan too. hmmmz... mastermind bf wat are u up to huh!!

2010-10-03T01:28:00.003+08:00

Plans plans plans...

sat 2nd oct: party stuff shopping wif bf(:
sun 3rd oct: laze at home sunday wif the furball son since ive abandoned him the whole of saturday!

mon 4th oct: MUMSIE's BDAY!! stay home day to rest wif bf(:
tues 5th oct: facial
wed 6th oct: colour hair... 6pm: mani+pedi.. 8pm: dinz n ladies nite wif kerry baby!! like FINALLY!!
thurs 7th oct: bake day... 7pm: meet best for dinz!
fri 8th oct: dinz wif bf... cuscaden for pre drinks wif my bros.. zirca wif everyone else!
sat 9th oct: register for my BTT!! (: gonna be taking manual btw! dinz wif idk who... azzura/play wif bf, darren n crew
sun 10th oct: REST DAY

OMG STOKED FOR NEXT WK!! =D and and mumsie is coming back on the 13th!!

people who noe me n wanna join me at zirca.. PLS COME!! =D esp people i havnt seen in a while!!!

okay byeeee... shall go to bed cuz my furball son is already passed out on the floor! these few nites hes been sleeping soooo late cuz of his mother who refuse to sleep till like 6! =D

2010-10-01T15:35:00.004+08:00

happy 9th my poopoo boy!!! (:

realli cant wait for my bday next wk... n ur bday 2 weeks after mine!!!! oh n our combine bday celebration!!! partying wif our frens n jus enjoying ur company! its gonna be our 1st bdays we spent together so ima make urs EXTRA SPECIAL!! got so many crazy things planned for u!! n i realli cant wait for u to see them! n baby we have many many many many thrillion yrs of bdays to spent together!!

my heart may be small.. but my love for u is VERI BIG!! =D i love u baby!

thursday sept 31st

-met up wif ethel twin in town for a nice chillout session! OMG I MISS HER LIKE CRAZZZYYY!

-n i realli cant wait for my bday next wk cuz shes nt gonna work on fri n celebrate my bday wif me!! =D

-our chillout session kinda got interrupted though.. but nevetheless we still had soooo much fun!

-home i went to change... xavier came to pick me up

-bottle tree park wif xavier, isk, aylwyn, marcus n his gf for dinz

-wanted to prawn thr but it was dam small.. so off to bishan we went!! when sarah came to join us too!

-prawn prawn... like we got 4 prawns onli after 3hrs!!! LOL SAD MUCH! FAIL PRAWNERS!

-nigel came during the last hr.. drank beer n chilled out talking nonsense

-drove down to pick nicole up then prata house for supper! more nonsense talk

-isk drove me home!

great great chill nite wif my bros(((:

k will upload blog again when im back. gg over to bf's hse wif the furball son!

2010-09-29T17:05:00.003+08:00

wat a wasted niteeee!!!
so this was last nite! k i noe i look totally smashed in the pics but by the time we took those pics we had 7 jugs of beer, shots of tequila, cherry shooter, butterscotch shooter n whisky coke! yepsss! i was having a hard time smiling cuz i jus couldnt stop laughing!! i was the happy high drunk last nite! k we all were!

after our forensic paper.. isk dropped me home then i came home having inspirations for me n bf's bday!! yeps we are having a combine theme party!!! gonna be heading to get party supplies on saturday n the invites will be sent out by this wkend(: kinda stoked cuz i got the theme done.. entertainment n even the cake!! k i thot abt the flavour of the cake but nt the design yet!! sigh hopefully i can think of one by the end of this wk! (:

anyways then i got ready n headed down to cityhall n met my bros isk n xavier n when we met we were like "WTH y are we all in BLACK!!!". headed down to town 1st.. ion for my yami yogurt, far east for chicken rice n the tw sweet potato thingy then we strolled down to cuscaden! n tts when the madness began!!

we drank till like thr was no tmr! meeting random people n talking to them n all! nice people at cuscaden. running up the dam escalator countless times jus to get to the toilet. im still rather amazed at hw i managed to walk up wasted in my 4 inch clogs! after a while julian joined us n it got crazier! we started talking abt realli DETAILED nonsense n all! whoa i had a blast! the best part was the last... we staggered our drunk lil asses to orchard mrt station n took a dam train home!! n i even heard the train song n shouted "OMG I LOVE THE TRAIN SONG!" embarrassing but true! lol

i got my drunk lil ass to yck station whr bf picked me up. thank goodness for him cuz idk hw i would hav made it home! he even had to help me upstairs cuz the fatty boy was staying over n as i stepped into the hse.. i fell rite on my ass! SOOOOOOOO WASTED! but it was a great nite! but then ive swore nt to drink till my bday next wk!

ive become such a FAIL drinker! my threshold is still thr like i still no whr i am n all but the kick hits me much faster than be4!! PUI tts the cost i hav to pay for quitting my partying lifestyle! gonna try to tank next wk for my bday!!

so today is a lazy day n thank goodness i didnt wake up wif a hang over!! watched gossip girl, 90210, vampire diaries, showered the smelly boy. n nw im gonna watch glee! k BYE!

2010-09-26T23:04:00.009+08:00

its been a while......
mega looonnnngggggg post!

wanna say thxs to those who still read my blog even wif my minimal postings!! but ive jus been such a boring person wif studying at starbucks almost everyday! so here are pics frm MANY wks ago!!

-when bf n i had the car.. cruising around like "grown ups"... him being awesome picking me up frm skool n driving to town((: heeeheeee. oh n this was the day we went on our mooncake hunt!!! YESS we LOVE mooncakes!!!! we paraded around the taka sq like up n down many aisles trying samples frm atas hotels to those pastry shops around chinatown? we went down to taka twice!!! choc baileys, oreo cheesecake, cranberry, strawberry hibiscus, peach cheesecake, passionfruit!! OMG n they are ALL MOONCAKES OKAAYYY!! DIVINE I TELL U!
some pics of the 2 monsters at my place(: tell me my dog n cat are like SUPER PHOTOGENIC!! OMG any pet mags tt see this if u wanna book them as models.. omg i WILL SAY YESSSS!!!! =D email me k! LOL oh this was when jewel "smacked" mochi cuz he was too close to her! in her lil space! LOL
so on fri jus be4 my psych paper.. i felt mega sick so wif the help of isk n xavier they shoved me into a cab n i went to ktp hosp n paps rushed down to meet me thr. ran blood n pee test nw watever nt. couldnt detect anything. PUI but my doc said i wasnt fit for my exam n gave me an mc. realli wanted to give my paper a miss said i didnt study at all but aiya 100 mcq onli so jus anyhw... but i did okay i think! bf came to pick me up when i was done n drove to get supper since its a MUST tt i eat (order frm my mum, paps, docs n bf!) to stop my low BP.

k anyways... SOMEONE IS TURNING 18 in 13days!!! WHOOOOOO =D u noe hw stoked i am!!!!! k so normally everyone who turns legal will def head to zouk. well ive been thr done tt n i feel its overrated. plus every underage punk can enter like its lost its novelty already! so... im heading to... PLAY ON MY BDAY!!!! on a SATURDAY NITE!! yepperrss its GAY nite!! =D so im gonna be finding my GAY BESTFREN at PLAY on my bday!!

i asked bf to hire a girl n give her to me as my girl bestfren for my bday prezzie this yr. cuz 2 of my girl bestfrens are in perth.. too far away frm. n kerry baby is too busy n all! so i NEED a new BESTFREN!! but aiya i nv realli click wif much girls. like u either hav to be a party crazy woman like me or is small as me! LOL n i too feel tt girls are VICIOUS creatures!! so i figured y nt i get a GAY BEST FREN!!!? (: honestly i feel they are the NICEST people eveerrrr with GREAT fashion sense!! so yes im pretty stoked for PLAY on my bday((:

n paps is gg bkk next thurs for a food convention thingy n i REALLI wanna go!! so it would make my pre-bday PERFECT!! and and hes also gg to paris during my bday wk so im hoping for an AWESOME 18th bday prezzie!! *hint hint wink wink*

last nite i camped over in my sister's room jus like old times(: n today was a lazy lazy day. movies, dramas all day!! pizza for lunch, paps cooked herbal soup for both of us be4 he left for work in the morning for dinz n he kept calling to make sure we ate. LOL hes so cute! then me n my sis walked to the pasar malam n bought alot of nonsense!! WAAHH SHIOK! i LOVE pasar malams! =D

last paper on tues! n after tt i will be planning an AWESOME bday for me n bf((: wheeee =D superly stoked seriously!! we are having a combine bday celebration!!! plus mumsie is coming back in oct too!

OCTOBER OCTOBER OCTOBER!!! OMG faster COME NOWWW!

2010-09-14T11:53:00.002+08:00

i wish i had a button to off all the misery and pain im feeling
i realli feel like im living in hell. i realli dunno how i make it through my everyday. studying, exams, weight n body issues, teenage angst, personal pains... i dunno how to deal with everything thrown at me now. i used to be such an optimistic person. but jus this yr ive been receiving blows after blows, its jus too much for me to handle. ive become a sad miserable person. i jus wanna scream and cry rite nw at this moment. i wanna get drunk n forget everything. my life has become shitty n mundane. waking up everyday is such a painful and tedious thing to do. sometimes i wish i can sleep n wake up only when I feel like it. nt wake up n deal wif everything.

im hoping all this is my pms. but i noe it isnt cuz its too early for me to be feeling like this. i dunno hw to cheer myself up. retail therapy? i dun even hav the mood n ability to drag myself out of the hse n battling wif the sun. im rite nw at starbucks n u noe it took me so much effort jus to change n get my ass out of the hse. i realli dunno hw i do all this.

my mood is jus like the weather. unpredictable. im tired.. i jus wanna be in my mum's embrace. yea but shes so many countries away. tears are welling up in my eyes rite nw. im tt miserable. i feel suffocated n lost.. aggitated n annoyed. i cant smile.. i cant function.. i cant even concentrate on watever im studying. i feel soul less. its like my soul has left me when i sleep n its yet to find its way back to my body. im an empty carcus.

i wanna get drunk n party my life away. can i jus do tt for 1 whole week? maybe i shall. when 28th sept ends.. im gonna be partying or chilling wif drinks wif people tt make me happy. n when my bday comes.. im gonna do the same: party n get drunk. tts wat i need to do rite nw!

but i realli am thankful for my boyfren who has been supporting me no mater wat i do. hes always encouraging me when i feel shit abt myself. when my self-esteem is low to the roots in the ground. when i feel fat he always tells me im pretty n loves me unconditionally for who i am. when i wanna get drunk he lets me but watches me n makes sure hes there. when i feel like giving up he pushes me n picks me up. when i cry he jus listens quietly over the fone or if hes beside me.. hugs me so tight n jus let me cry. its becuz of him i dun give up entirely on my life. its becuz of him n the dog tt keep me sane in this shitty ass world. i would hav died a long time ago if i hav nv found him. so thank u my baby.. n i love u

realli cant fking wait for exams to be over! trust me u will see me back at my home (zirca) every wk! i need tt kind of liberation after so long of being trapped in this lil bubble.

2010-09-07T22:29:00.002+08:00

HEY! we got a NEW DOG!!! (:
we decided to trade in our crazy dog for a more well behaved one! k im kidding!! lol everyone has been asking me whether we got a new dog! LOL but no.. mochi jus had a new hair cut!! we honestly couldnt recognise him when we picked him up! but he jus ran out n ritw into our arms so we confirmed tt "YEP tts OUR crazy boy!!"

sean even think his hair cut made him more "sane"? cuz his scruffy look gave him some kind of crazy personality but nw tt hes cleanly shaved down.. hes more calm which suits his cut? idk man

before
after...will post up pics frm yesterday's crazy karaoke day wif my bros! it was EPIC FUN!! crazy screaming n jumping on couches! FUN SHITTZZZ

oh n my bf is the sweetest everrrrrr. aiyo cannot stand him n his sweetness!! sometimes i feel im gonna die frm diabetes cuz of him! HAHAH! k BYE criminal minds nw!!

2010-09-05T19:32:00.002+08:00

i really love my bestest boyfren in the world(((:

boyfren has been the bestest!! (well he always is) nw tt he has the car.. hes been picking me up from skool, sending me to meet my bros to study then leaving to go home n rest then come back to pick me up again when im done! (: oh n even drove me to go get my shoes! realli appreciate him driving up n down jus for me. nw ive become so dependent on his car to send me around. BAD BAD BAD cuz next wk his rents comes back home which means no more frequent use of the car!! :( well it was good while it lasted(: n hes been hanging around my bros n i getting to noe them n they all simply ADORE him as much as i do(:

i love so much baby! n i realli cannot thank u enough!

OMG i NEED to post a pic of mochi boy soon!! HES MAD CUTE wif his new hair cut!! basically nw u can realli tell hes a schnauzer! LOL

so yest we dropped our babyboy down for his grooming. bf drove me to dover n get my shoes then HV for crystal jade xlb which was OMG ORGASMIC! waayyyy nicer then dtf i swear! paps was rite! then walked around HV which was like memories for me cuz me n mumsie always went there last time n gosh the shops which are like nearly 10plus yrs old were still there!! went to get babyboy n we got a shock wif his hair cut!! totally couldnt recognise him at all but luckily he could recognise us! if nt we would hav thot we picked up the wrong dog!!! went back to bf's n lazed around, he played W.O.W while i finished my stupid spss report then dropped babyboy back to my hse cuz my sis wanted to see him. then we went to watch 'cats n dogs: revenge of kitty galore'. it was MAD CUTE! then home we went((:

k shall post a pic of babyboy soon! BYE

2010-09-03T22:42:00.003+08:00

i fking HATE SPSS!!!

GAAHHH stupid stats assignment n SPSS is a BITCH! but thank goodness for my steph dear to help me! anyways... im soooo bored so im blogging!

its quite sad hw i havnt been gg out to take pics. me n mr yang hav been lazy potatoes. jus staying at home n watching tv. no we dun pig out THAT much but nw wif the car, we can get around but we are jus so lazy. plus its study break already n i realli MUST study! skool has drained my social life n its killing ALL OF US! bf has been busy n tired wif work so our outings hav been minimised! yea so no clubbing either n its been 3 mths!!? OMG longest hiatus eveeeerrrrr!

this was taken on 13th aug at zouk for justin's nus biz pageant
n 14th aug when me n bf went to watch 'the last airbender'. i must say it was quite good even though i diss the cartoon all the time! tmr is gonna be a day out like FINALLY!! yea but jus to send our furball son to grooming. (he smells like pee btw!) n to collect my shoes!!! WHOOO =D

k shall concenrate on my criminal minds! BYE!

2010-09-02T01:22:00.003+08:00

LONG POST AHEAD!! (to make up for the 2wks i havnt blogged)

boyfren jus reminded me hw long i havnt blogged. n im guessing no one reads my blog anymore due to my disappearance. but mehhh i blog when i feel like it! n if ur "lucky" to chance upon this space.. i may hav updated!

its 1 day after the 1st of sept but... HAPPY 8th baby!! (: bf has a fish craze so he bought an aquarium n i got him 4 fishes for his 8th mth prezzie! n i noe hw much he loves his prezzie! we had a nice chill day at home at nite after baby finished work. i went to the hosp n then studied at macs at yishun then he picked me up(: be4 we got out of the car he said "ur 8th mth prezzie is on the way." this boy always noes hw to spring surprises on me! I LOVE U! had pasta for dinz n decided to be tv addicts (yea our FAV past time together) n watch our new fav channel 'food network asia'!! yepperss we ARE food crazy people!! but yet we are people wif small appetites!! so its dam sad hw we both cant go for buffets or steamboat cuz for me i def dun eat worth the buffet or watever is cost!

*k some pics taken jus then when we were bumming at my place!*

on the good side my monsterous eating hav plunged n ive lost weight again!! (: am almost to my ideal weight but yet everyone is saying "stop losing weight u bitch!" haa

on the bad side.. if uve followed my twitter i did go through some pitfalls on monday due to my grades. i nv felt so down abt my grades till i cried! i always made fun of girls who cried during pri n sec skool. but hello this is UNI!! my future depends on this $40 000 dam paper!!! so i broke down. but realli cannot thank my bf, mum n bros tt encouraged me the whole of monday! my bros took me out to eat my cravings for the day: oreo, cookie spinz n fried rice n they ate my leftovers! LOL n they acknowledged hw much help ive been to them if nt they wouldnt hav scored. realli MAD LOVE my BROS (: then wif bf n mum's constant support.. im alot better! wats better than being surrounded by people who love u n pick u up when u feel like crap!!? (:

so exams are coming soon.. n i freaking cant wait for it to be over!! so many plans after!! WHOOOO

plan 1: visit mummy in shanghai (yea i noe i vowed on my life i will nv step into a cheena country but for i love my mummy!) then fly back home. celebrate my bday in sg at ZIRCA n PLAY! then fly off to perth wif bf n darren! then back home to celebrate bf's bday!

plan 2: if mummy comes home, shanghai n perth trip cancelled. but ZIRCA n PLAY plan is a def! then maybe a bkk trip wif bf n darren!! (: then back home to celebrate bf's bday!

yesss people i CANT wait to turn 18 n go to PLAY on my bday which happens to fall on a sat nite this yr n its GAY NITE at PLAY!! im gg on a hunt to find a gay bestfren!! WAH DAM STOKED PLSSS!

k i jus took 2 spoons of cough syrup n my drowsy flu med to make me sleep. im loopy n groggy nw n my monster furball son cant wait for me to sleep cuz hes like KO-ed on the marble floor.

shall end wif a crazy CLASSIC face of mine! tt furball of mine was literally chomping on my hand while bf took this pic!

ps.. i LOVE this drowsy groggy feeling! HAAAA

n i LOVE u SEAN YANG!!!

2010-08-09T12:19:00.006+08:00

long wkend = no work done!!!!

so hw was ur long wkend??? mine was AWWWEEESSOOMMEE! since i did nth except fuss over my furball monster!

friday
-i realli cant rmb wth i did on fri arvo!!
(k i jus checked my twitter! gotta LOVE twitter seriously!!)
-i slept the whole of my friday!! realli needed my sleep
-then at nite bf drove over n drove my sis n i to do some grocerry shopping cuz we wanted to bake!
-baked choc chip n granola cookies for sat's gathering

saturday
-my sis, nic n i took the 2 dogs trax n mochi for grooming!!!
-wasted alot of our time at HV while waiting for the dogs to be done
-chilled at wala wala wif beers n bf came down to join us(:
-went to pick the monsters up n mochi made some frens today!!!
-then they dropped us at karan's
-mochi made frens wif ella!! (karan's goldy) then kerry baby came!
-havnt had such nice chill out chit chat sessions in a while!!! esp nw tt we dun meet each other so often
-HV for dinz n mochi was such a cougar magnet i sweaarrr!! everyone wanted to carry him n oogled all over him!
-came home n i crashed my ass
it was a gd sat cuz my babyboy finally made some frens!!!! OMG

sunday was jus spent studying since i felt guilty for nt doing anythinggg!

monday HAPPY BDAY SINGAPORE!!!

went for ndp to watch the bf march!! wah i swear it was my proudest moment evvveerrr as a gf!! i was crazy tweeting if u follow me!! LOL he was part of the colour party n he was carrying a white flag!! the ONLI one carrying the white flag so go watch the encore n look out for him k!!!! (:

k tts all i did... realli quite fun((: finaly managed to chill n relax wifout stupid skool! so hw did yall spend ur ndp hols? (:

2010-08-05T16:08:00.007+08:00

im 17 n still a minor so im entitled to act like a 5yr old crying for her mummy

(wordy post dedicated to my mummy)

psych mid term over.. nw to rush out my lab report which is due in 7 days n ive jus complteted writting my abstract n mug like mad for forensic mid term next tues! im gonna get my dam Distinction i tell u! cuz i can kiss my psych D goodbye thxs to the stupid lecturers! pfffttt n doing my research for my dam lab report is frustrating cuz my net is mad slow n the fking journal articles on my skool webbie is DAMMMM BIG FOLDERS!

(mother's day last yr in perth. where i made pancakes for breaky for mummy n baked caupcakes too!)

if uve been reading my twitter these few nites u would noe hw big of a cry baby i am n mummy's girl i am. yeppers mumsie has left for shanghai this morn. these last few nites hav been rough. it all started on tues nite when mummy suddenly came into my room while i was studying for psych n burst into tears n came to hug me saying she would miss me alot when shes away. it then hit me so hard tt this is the 1st time my mummy is gonna be away frm me! like all my 17 yrs we've nv been apart, she came to be wif me in perth!! i guess our perth stay together brought us ALOT closer. like it was onli both of us in the hse. i loved tv times wif her esp during winter! i would be sitting rite next to the heater in my betty boob purple flannel pjs n we would be snacking away like craaazzzyyyy cuz of the weather n watching tv together. no we dun talk much while we watch tv but its the company tt counts nt the communication. along the 2yrs plus yes we got into a few tussles. i guess we had no one to argue wif except each other so it sparked a few arguements n all. me being head strong nv give in. looking back i apologised to mummy n she said its wat daughters do. which i couldnt agree more. us kids are jus out to make lives like hell for our parents/do them proud. i guess nw i hav the balance of both.

so the last few nites were baddd. waking up wif puffy eyes n i resort to puting ice pack on my eyes jus to bring the puffiness down. at 1ish am i snuggled rite next to my mummy wif tears falling at occasional times n in her embrace watch tv together for the last few hrs be4 we had a 2hr sleep then woke up n headed to the airport at 6am. watching mummy together wif my uncle n his fam walk through the departure gates were tough. me being the baby in the fam n the closest to my mummy made me vulnerable in such situations. i hav MAJOR separation issues n i would jus wail for hrs. yea no joke! i held back every tear tt was wanting to burst through my eye sockets while i watched my mummy's back turn against me.

initially when mum told us abt her plan to shanghai i immediately thot of 1 word 'freedom'. but as the days drew nearer it made me realise hw much im so dependent on my mum n hw close we were. esp when i was younger being pushed in n out of operating theatres n wif my mum always by my side n staying at the hospital wif me. hw can i ever bear to let her go for my temporary joy of freedom. sigghh...the saying "if u love someone let them go" is jus totally BS i tell u! but wat comforted me the most abt her departure was tt she trusts me n my sis tt we would be fine on our own wif lil supervision. n tt she has entrusted my life wif sean. she trusts tt he would take care, guide, support n be there for me while shes away. wat can be greater than my mummy trusting my boyfren. also becuz he is older, more mature n has goals in life n she noes tt whenever im wif him i will be safe n she doesnt hav to worry.

so to my mummy... i love u so much. take care n im always here for n wif u even though we are far apart.

depression aside... me n bf celebrated our 7th mth together on sunday wif a sushi party at my place!!! (: yea me n my sis woke up early to make sushis for the boyss. tsskkk the things we do for our boyfrens! yepperss its been 7 great mths!! all the support n comfort we've given each other over the mths cannot be explained. esp recently wif my struggle wif skool, seperation issues frm my mummy n all.. sean has been there wif me comforting me n finding ways to cheer me up wif his stupid high pitchy psychotic laughs! hopefully he gets the car tonite so he can drive me to the dam library n borrow books on my stupid fked up lab report. pfffttt... realli cant wait for sat though!! reunion wif the zirca fam like FINAALLLLYYY!! n we're bringing our dogs!! WHOOOO =D ive missed my babies for too long!! busy wif skool, a levels, exams, travelling, bic races, army n wat nt! pffttt...

am off to nap n hopefully wake up to find bf in my hse! heh x)

2010-07-29T15:31:00.005+08:00

dear body... im sorri but i dont love you...

anyways mon n tues was well spent wif bf(: we had so much fun! pigging out mostly! LOL i was so depressed after i stuffed my face wif popcorn n reese i decided to do push up, crunches n jumping jacks okaayy!! then becuz of tt i vomitted all my shit out jus like tt! HAHA funnaayyee

u noe wat makes me so upset? tt asian girls are sooooo small size whereas im nt! yea im short but nt skinny short. n wat makes it worse is tt every single girl i noe n i see are all weight crazy people! (yea me included!) i mean idk y us asian girls emphasise so much abt our weight. always comparing wif other skinner prettier girls to "wanna look like TAT". think ok do u ever see a fat (k maybe nt fat but nt skinny) girl on the front cover of our asian magazines!!!? NO RITE!!! whereas in aussie... u see all shapes n sizes of girls on the front cover n they LOVE their body size. i mean hello!!? its us asians who bring so much emphasis abt skinny bods. i wish i can say i love my body. sadly i dun. when i was younger i was a bag of bones (literally) but nt im a huffalump! i guess tts y i detest my body even more nw. cuz i WAS ONCE stick thin n nw.. pfftt DISAPPOINTMENT! but realli y cant us asian girls jus love ourselves? im struggling to ans tt question myself too.

im suppose to be studying but somehw i started to get lazy. sigghh wats happening to my goals n aims in life?!!!! idk man... i wish i had a photographic memory. tt way studying would be easier n much more fun!!!

anyways last thurs bf DROVE to my place!!! whoooooo =D he finally converted his aussie license n he had his dad's car!!!! so we drove to admiralty mrt station (yes its dam near but i managed to "lure" him into his car n drive me!!! heh) then along the way picked mumsie up n we drove home(: he stayed for dinz then we decided to drive over to kerry baby's hse wif babyboy((: stayed there for a while n she went crazy over mochi! we had some good fun((: missed my babygirl sooooo much!

k so ive changed my hairstyle!!! tues went to colour/highlight/treatment n cut my hair!! nw i hav bangs!!! idk wat brown base but its copper red streaks!!!

so wed is my psych test n i cant seem to rmb shit!! WHY LIKE THIS!!!! sigghh my poor pea brain! hokay off to try to study nw!! BYEEE

2010-07-24T11:50:00.004+08:00

byebye ben
so i FINALLY took my cam out after sooooooooooooooooooooo long! becuz skool started n i rarely go out. so finally me n bf went out yesterday n went on a eating feast!!! (yea so much for losing weight!) n i gained back wat i lost over 2 days in 1 day!! SIGHHHH k but my tumtum was HAPPY!! swimming wif fish n chips n my CRAVING of the mth: grilled ham n cheese sandwich in foccasia bread!! WHOOOO HAPPY SHITTSSS

k but despite but fattyness yesterday... my collar bones were more distinct then evveerr!! YAY! k but i think today gone already since i ate like a cowwww!

a wrap up of wat me n bf did yest!
-airport for fish n co.. then sent ben off back to aussieland!!
-gloria jeans where i did a lil on my forensic. borrrriinnnnggggg
-decided to go bugis cuz we havnt been there in a while (tts the 1st place we ever met btw!!)
-shisha n stoned till the sun set
-decided to go to 1 of the shops at haji cuz i finally found the rainbow maxi dress after a loooonngggg time! bf talked me into buying it! wheeee x) oh n i almost bought another pair of wedges but didnt cuz he stopped me! haha might want to get tt pair soon!
-then we left for dinz at empire state for my sandwich!! WHOOOOO =D
-n home we weennnttt
-it seemed like we didnt do much but gosh we were beat!!

so jus a few pics cuz we took SOOOOOO many yest!! yea i spammed cuz its been a while we took pics together!!! took realli nice ones yest(:

k decided to share wif yall some points on r/s. ps its frm my psych textbook!! LOL

3 factors tt contribute to an ongg r/s:

personal dedication (positive attraction to a particular partner n r/s)
moral commitment (a sense of obligation, religious duty or social responsibility as controlled by a person's values n moral principles)
constraint commitment (factors tt make it costly to leave a r/s such as lack of attractive alternatives n various social, financial, legal investments in the r/s)

k enough nonsense.. i noe the 3 factors are abit profound? LOL but u get wat it says la rite!!!!

back to studying... saturdays are my sad depressing alone day where i study my butt off cuz bf is marching in ndp. pfftt...

oh n as i like to EMPHASISE!!! i CANT read CHINESE!!!! so pls stop commenting in chinese cuz its pointless since i cant read!

k BYE

2010-07-21T17:13:00.003+08:00

hectic week
i blog when im bored.. when i feel i did something interesting.. to rant n let off some steam. today is to let off some steam. k but things are ok nw(: but still i think its time for me to blog abt my life again.

so recently my life took a turn on its own. n if ur following my twitter u would noe. i constantly tweet abt the ups n downs. sometimes i feel like im bipolar/schzophrenic but im nt okaayy! somehw things jus started falling apart. shant go into details but basically i could hav collapsed. but wif the love n support frm the people who love me.. im holding up quite well. nt to mention names in case i miss out any but yall noe who u are. my skool mates may nt noe wat went wrong.. but their constant jokes n making fun of me for being the "xiao mei mei" among all of us, babying me alot jus helped me so much. lifted up my spirits. these bunch of frens (mainly guys) hav subconsciously supported me n wif them made me gg to skool a more enjoyable trip everyday. nt forgetting sean who has been there for me, listening n lending me his shoulders jus made it all seem better. though we too hav our ups n downs.. im glad we always manage to calmly settle everything between each other.

so aside frm all this.. my life is basically revolving around skool. i plan my days everyday on wat i need to study n wkends are crammed wif work. so depressing but i hav no choice. realli am aiming hard to get my honors cuz it is veri prestigious n would def help wif application of jobs/salary in the future when i enter the work force. so basicaly ive pretty much decided where n i wanna work n wat i wanna do(: quite excited realli to get all my education out of the way n do "big grown up stuff"

anyways as yall noe i rarely blog nw. so if u want constant 24/7 updates abt my life follow me on twitter: www.twitter.com/foeshitzme trust me i NEVER go wifout a day of tweeting. my life revolves around it too!! like i feel so dysfunctional n crazy wifout tweeting for 1 day! LOL n i jus restored my formspring: http://formspring.me/foeshitzme n there u can ask me anything abt me, my life or watsoever. n as i mentioned in my previous post.. thxs for the comments but i rarely check or dun even reply them cuz its hard replying via tt thing. so any comments go ahead n post it up on my formspring k!! cheerzzzz(: oh n fofo updates feel free to add me up on facebook!

yall hav a gd week... advice for the wk: hang in there if ur exhausted wif ur life or gg through rough patches nw.. cuz after a stormy weather the clear blue skies n the sun will shine upon u again(:

2010-07-18T16:49:00.005+08:00

currently at the bf's crib((:

every sunday is our lazy day together as a fam wif mochi boy too! chilling n being lazy being couch potatos! today we had macs for lunchhh!! yumyum((: i realli LOVE sundays wif bf n monster furball.

k i noe ive been missing frm my lil space... but but ive been lazzyyyyy. as usual! n we are watching hannah montana nw!! (: n hav been busy wif skool. decided to realli study hard this sem

gonna be camping here till 10 tonite... supper wif bf n the guyssssssss. which means im gg home late tonite n skool is at 9 tmr.. yeppersss

k shit my this post is dam borrrinnngggggg. nth to realli blog abt these days but skool, mochi boy, bf n i. simple simple life n ive stopped partying. decided to onli party on hols onli!

ok byeeeee!!! oh n thxs for all the comments. keep them coming in(: n i still cant read chinese. HAHAHAHA

2010-07-09T17:09:00.005+08:00

sorri im jus a bitch..

i hav rarely or rather stopped bitching abt people via my blog for a while already. but this time i realli cant help it. n i noe tt person will be reading this.

k 1stly its MY fking choice if i wanna accept/deny or nt even respond to ur fb request. n excuse me say wat im so into such internet portals n i check it everyday?! obviously u hav no fking rite to say tt abt me since i dun even fking talk to u anymore n ive changed. i no longer glue myself to the net anymore since im more busy wif UNI nw n hanging out wif frens n my bf. i mean frm the min. blog entries nw cant u tell? like i realli cant stand when people say things they THINK they noe me but sorri u DONT!!!

2ndly.. wat meet for coffee? havnt i made it dam clear to u like mths ago i no longer wat anything to do wif u? wat are u so "desperate" to wanna try n be frens again? ur 1 person i can jus NO longer be frens wif anymore. n no i dun feel upset abt it. its nt like i havnt let go or wat shit. jus tt i find u so... ARRGGGHHHH (no word to describe) n i jus can no longer hav a frenship wif u let alone meet u face-to-face for coffee. my reply "raincheck" (taken advice frm isk! LOL) tt im indirectly saying im nt interested.

so idk wats ur deal!! like y do u wat so badly to be part of my life again? cuz realli i do nt give a beezwax. i normally would brush such things aside n nt bother replying u or watsoever but ive come to a point where i can no longer take all this anymore. like which part of ''fk off'' do u nt understand? we (bf n i) dun wish ur presence to be part of our lives spankssss

yea whoever who is reading this wanna call me a bitch go ahead. cuz i dun realli care either but this is jus wat i want to say.

on a happier note... bf is coming over for dinz later!! the furball monster has been living wif me for the past 5days n gosh hes CRAZZZYYY! i started skool last wk n im like stressing out already!!? i NEED my honors soooooo badly!!! which means i gotta work EXTRA HARD!!! when i turn 21.. i will either intern for a yr.. then fly over to melbourne n complete my masters there. am dam motivated plsss.

k i jus lied in my last sentence. im INSPIRED rather but its a fri n ive got no skool on fri but i havnt studied!!? LOL blame my nose or the weather but im lazzyy but yet i noe ive got sooooo much to do!! grrr.. HATE MY BRAIN!

oh last nite had an impromptu dinz n milkshake nite wif bf, ben, clement, matthew, winston n justin. simple nite but i always hav fun wif bf n his frens((: sad tt quite a few of them are leaving to abroad to study. but oh wells.. part n parcel of life! in like 4 yrs time will be me n bf's turn((:

shall end wif 2 pics during my trip to bkk like 3 wks ago...

oh n idk y i keep getting comments in chinese. sorri to say tt i cant read chinese AT ALL!! (yea im a failure as a chinese but cant help it okaayyy i lived in aus for 3yrs!!) so if yall dun mind... pls comment in english. cheerzzz (:

2010-07-03T18:13:00.003+08:00

i noe ive abandoned my blog!! but ive jus become such a lazy potato to blog abt anything. dun get me wrong my life aint mundane or watsoever. esp during hols. but im lazy? HAHAHAk recap on wat i did over the hols

-movie dates wif bf((: caught toys story 3, shes out of my league, karate kid n idk wat already! but basically we've watched all the latest ones!

-sleep... sleep n more sleep

-bkk trip wif mumsie n sis for 4 days was da bommmbbbzz! i shopped till i dropped tt my cupboard has NO SPACE AT ALL!!!! so ima do a selling post REAL SOON!! keep a look out k!! (: SPANKS!

so yepperss! well sem 2 for uni has begun for me. n im even more stressed out. wanted to study today but am sick. so meehhh... stress cuz i realli need to achieve 4 distinctions for all my 4 subs this sem!! well at least 2 Ds n 2 credits then! am gonna push hard to get into honors. but plans are still melborne after i finish 3 yrs over here. but nw mumsie wants me to go london? hmmm.. the distance jus puts me off. plus its a total diff system frm aussie. then theres my dad who wants me to go nus. yea i wish!!! LOL the day i get into nus is the day pigs fly!! plus its impossible for me to go back to the sg system already eversince i adopted the aussie system like 3yrs ago? so naaahhhh

jus on thurs me n bf celebrated our 6th mth together(: things hav obviously been good. though a few fights here n there.. nth has changed wif both of us(: the best times are when we tickle each other n laugh till we fall on the floor. LOL as wat he says "u dun start a war u cant finish!!" hes a cutesie realli(: yest was Eclispe wif bf n nandos dinz wif karan n luke(: enjoyed eclipse cuz of TY's HOT ASS BOD!! =D n i felt the fight scene was GOOOODDD!

okay dokes! off i go to sunset grill for dinz wif mumsie, sis n nick. becuz of bf's ndp rehearsal he cant join us :( yea hes marching for ndp!!!! which means i hav to go this yr to support bf((: n shall end off wif a pic of bf n i when we met shingles boy n kellyn 1 day for hk cafe(:

classic face i tell u!! dun u think he looks like a chipmunk? HEEHEE! LOVE U!

2010-06-16T02:24:00.004+08:00

jus 4 pics to make up for the lack of updates..

ladies nite wif mitchell on 2nd june at my home base zirca

4th june lazy day wif bf n mochi boy11th june flyer wif bf((:my hols are flying by be4 my eyes. another wk till i face the gates of hell = skool! grrrr. but anywhos ive been enjoying myself a hell alot!! this hols was spent wif bf hunting down exotic food frm persian, mexican, italian n bufflo winggsss!!! (: greatest food we ever eaten seriously!!

so today was a good day((: went to do some stuffs early in the arvo wif bf... then we decided to go shoe hunting(: hav been trying to find ideal pairs of wedges n failed for the past few days but onli today we hit jackpot!!! bought 2 pairs of wedges n bf bought me my clogs!! =D met up wif shingles boy (aka jin) n gf kellyn for hk cafe where my french toast cravings were answered!!! on top of tt ben is back frm aus... met up wif him for a while be4 i left the guys to meet best((: chilled talked.. then i met up wif bf, ben, darren, aaron, melvin n justin again for coffee n their awkward stares weirded me out!? LOL but nevertheless.. fruitful day as its been a while since me n bf came out to town n paraded around like free birds. after we got mochi boy.. we had to be home bound quite a bit cuz we dun wanna be neglecting him riteee.

its wed again! which means ladies nite!!!! k idk whether i wanna go but whoevers up for it give me a buzz k!!!

its currently 4.45am. staying awake for another 30mins jus to wake bf up! poor boy has been quite deprived of fun lately due to his busy schedule. our fri usual clubbing nites hav turned dull since he cant drink cuz of his ndp rehearsal thingy early the next morn. sacrifices we make for an honourable role he has nw. jus another 2mths!!!

shall try to upload pics later in the arvo if i aint heading anywhere at nite!

toodle dooooooosssss(:

2010-06-05T00:17:00.002+08:00

just a few pics....
jus came back from bf's ((: spent the day lazing at home as usual. maccas for dinz. YUMMMMMZZ! n sex n the city marathon!! YEAAAHHH! =D tmr will be a nite at zirca. jus gonna pop by cuz im lending my fatty cam to kenneth.

im soooo poofed out! but bet am gonna sleep at 3am onli. pfftt... oh wells. its such an unhealthy daily routine. but gotta tire myself out tonite so i can last till tmr nite!!! ps.. me n bf are FINALLY gg to church on sunday!! am gonna call all my boys when im there((:

k byeeeee...

2010-06-03T16:47:00.006+08:00

k i shall start wif pics frm darren's 23rd bday celebration at sushi tei n harry's bar after((: like wayyy back in 15th may anyways... EXAMS HAV OFFICIALLY ENDED!!! WHOOOO =D

so my daily activities? well ive been catching up on my precious sleep((: and jus done wif 90210 n GG.. nw for vampire diaries!! sleeping at 6am everyday has become such an unhealthy routine but i do so cuz i wanna sleep through the whole day n skipping lunch!! UHHUH yes update on my weight... my monsterous diet last week due to my major pms is finally back to normal!! wif 1 meal a day or no meal at all(: yes unhealthy but im doing quite well((: few more kgs to my ideal weight!! whoooo

so last nite was wed!! obviously its ladies nite for me since im done wif exams((: n where so i always go?? ZIRCA OF COURSE! this time wif the guys (mitchell, his cousin bryan n his fren) n partied a short while wif elissa! bumped into a couple of familiar faces too! anyways since i havnt been to my home for like a mth plus.. it was sooo nice to see the bouncers, bar staff n djs n bombarded by "wah havnt seen u for so long!!" such a pleasant feeling to noe tt im still remembered n missed there! LOL

nite ended up pretty early cuz mitchell passd out! LOL FUNAAYYE! made a detour trip to my 2nd hse to see this silly boy tt i love so much(: then home i went to watch tv n slept at 6!! LOL im such an owl!! goodness

oh btw be4 we headed to zirca.. me n mitchell went to vom fass! its at ion on the 4th floor n gosh yall must try their alcohol there!! its DIVINE!! alot of flavoured alcohol which is.. YUMMM! my fav is the sour cherry vodka((:

k will post wed's ladies nite pics up soon!! bf jus called himself gross! LOL wat a weird word to describe himself!! LOL k feel like gg down to the pool to chill! BYYEEE

2010-06-01T05:53:00.004+08:00

to my dearest n world's greatest boyfren any girl could ever hav...

1stly a thank you for being in my life. for always tolerating my nonsense, the princess tantrums i throw at u n though ur always caught off guard.. u always noe hw to calm me down n make me become a sane person again. esp during my periods or exam preps.. im the worse person everrr. nw uve even nick named me periodsauraus. yea im as bad as a breed of dinosaur! but nevertheless.. ur abundance of patience hav always proven tt you always ready to take watever of my princess tantrums n crazy shit i throw at u. n this i cannot thank u enough. n here i apologise for my crazy stunts. but i noe tt u truely love me for me for being so patient wif me all the time. always nv holding a grudge against me but forgiving me n giving room to grow.

being 5 yrs older than me u hav more life experiences than me. ur more mature n ur mind is controlled. i do go out of control sometimes. tts y i hav u to pull my reigns at time n bring me back to earth. yes im younger n hav abundance of energy tt sometimes u find it difficult keeping up wif me. but yet u still do even when ur so tired frm a days of work defending our country. (LOL)

uve done too much for me over these short span of 5mths. nth but showering me wif unconditional love n support in watever i do. sometimes i feel uve done too much than wat i deserve n ive done too little. baby i want so much to do so much more. but sometimes im jus clueless on wat i can do for all tt uve done for me. u hav painstakingly put all ur heart n soul into me.. into us. n im so greatly for tt. yes im 5 yrs younger than u. but this has nv been a factor to stop u frm giving me ur all.

2ndly, u nv judge me frm my past (u noe i noe who we are talking abt rite baby! LOL). the past mistakes ive made. but u do the opposite frm wat normal people would do. u pour out ur heart to me.. loving me no matter wat happens.. wat people say abt me.. wat insults throw at u abt me. this is jus one of the reason y i fell so crazily in love wif u. n when u get protective over me.. it jus brings a cuter side of u. (n yess u noe wat im talking abt! HAHA but u gotta admit.. wifout weirdos our life wont be so entertained riteeee!)

also wif the addition to our family.. mochi boy.. it def has brought our relationship to a whole new level. wif responsibilities nt jus a a boyfren or girlfren but as parents. treating our puppy as our own baby boy.

theres so much i wanna say!! this is nt even 1/4 of wat i gotta say!! but i guess i should stop here.
i noe this is dam long.. (am on the fone wif u nw. LOL n i still havnt slept a wink yet) but hav fun reading it on the bus otw to ocs k! i love u so much baby....
we are built to last baby... nw and to forever.. i love u wif all my heart sean
Happy 5th mth...

2010-05-30T16:00:00.004+08:00

some pics cuz im bored n refuse to study. heeeheee
bf says mochi boy looks like hes in jail. LOL tts his lil playpen okaayy!anyways i happen to browse this video on facebook n i must say im utterly disgusted n unraged by this video. i was literally trembling when i watched the video n i felt a punch in my heart. idk if ur able to browse it but if u can.. pls click on the link n watch the video. n after ur done.. click on the links at the side on the video page n sign the petition pls. animals have feelings n its jus nt rite tt dogs are being treated like this. esp since ive loved animals since i was young n im strongly against all this shit humans do to living loving creatures with feelings. so pls help...
http://www.facebook.com/home.php?sk=lf#!/video/video.php?v=1245205185271&ref=mf

2010-05-21T17:03:00.002+08:00

off to watch 'the last song' wif bf. leaving the lil monster at home! ((: baby boy is gg home tmr back wif bf.. no more monster nonsense! lol.. its bf's turn!!!! =D

k BYYEEEE i NEED DINZ!! FUNGGRRAAAYYYY

2010-05-20T16:17:00.003+08:00

love love MOCHI BOYYY (: though hes such a tyrant these days. forever finding a chance to treat my feet like bait n him being the shark.. chomping my feet like theres no tmr. n when mr yang comes over.. he jus enjoys spending time wif him too(: treating mr yang's fingers as bait. but hes become part of both our families((: such a joy having him around despite the fact he always makes an effort everyday to try to make frens wif my princess snobby cat but she jus nv budges n hisses at him. but he still nv gives up! he nw responds to his name n everytime u call him.. expect a dash or rather a trot along on my marble floor and he pounces n attacks ur feet! LOL n finally we managed to get him to walk on the leash. cutesie boy runs sideways.. he trots most of the time n has learnt to stand on his hind legs to try to attack our fingers! hes making such progress as our babyboy n we've nv been so entertained by a 4 legged creature be4. we realli treat mochi boy as our child. tryin to discipline him n watch him grow up to a macho dog. HAHAHAA

my mum n sis are even enjoying mochi boy's presence. mum tries to throw mochi at jewel's face as an attempt to make them frens but obviously fail everyday. sis plays catching wif mochi. mum doesnt like dogs becuz of their smell tts y we settled for a cat but wif mochi boy... she plays wif him n carries him((: oh n mochi boy LOVES fruits!

so yeaa pretty much ive been keeping myself busy wif mochi boy. k rather he keeps me busy wif hi constant shitting n peeing around the hse forcing me to get up at wee hrs of the nite jus to clean it up. yea life of a parent. plus ive been burying myself wif socio all wk im abt to crash n die rite nw. im bored stiff n i think its time to change sub to psych!

on top of this... ive been gorging my face wif unhealthy fatty food. i jus wanna suck my fat up n donate it to kids suffering frm malnutrition! swear they need my fats more plssss. sighh.. doesnt help tt im pmsing+exams stress... GRRR

rite nw im on a study break as in literally! catching up on GG n 90210(: lifes goooddd.. jus wish bf would depot his ass back frm tekong n come join my lazy fatty ass watching dramas wif me n mochi boy running around. this realli is our ideal family scene((:

2010-05-19T23:10:00.002+08:00

hi hi am thinking of doing a selling post soon since my wardrobe is spilling out clothes!!
YAY or NEH?!

plus most of the ones i intend to sell are ones ive NEVER wore be4!!! how how!!? anyone interested? if nt i wont bother posting them up! let me noe k!!!

LOVE LOVE LOVE

2010-05-15T15:33:00.004+08:00

so me n bf's secret mission....

yepperss we bought a dog!!!! (((: hes mochi a mini schnauzer n hes such a darl. realli jus like a human baby. we both hav been taking turns taking care of him due to bf's sudden work load thrown at him. so mochi boy will be staying wif me the whole of next wk((: n obviously the kitty isnt too happy. HAHAHA! hav been busy settling him down tt its taking a toll on both of us mentally n physically. but we are coping well together n also taking mochi out to dog cafes n all. so cute i tell u!!
it may look like hes always sleeping but its nt okaayy!! k he does sleep alot since hes a baby wad! but also becuz his eyes are black.. his fur is black.. its a bit diff to see his eyes opened! LOL

jus my take on the cyberspace...

wif the cyberspace... anything is written on it. esp via blogs/facebook/twitter/formspring. everyone has their free will to write abt wat they wanna say rite? even if its insults or compliments.. being a blogger or owning those networking accounts u need to expect these kinda shit am i nt rite? so fking take it wif a pinch of salt n move on. i had my fair share of insults flew my way a few yrs back. yea i took down my tagboard but yet i set up formspring where ur free to post watever u feel abt me. honestly if u cant take such insults frm anons n it hurts ur morals n self-esteem.. then fking dun own a blog or these networking accounts. arent u jus creating unnecessary hurt n trouble for urself? tts all i hav to say...

k shall go get ready to meet the bf at neesoon camp then head down back to his place n check on tt lil baby of ours. its his 1st time being left alone for 7hrs! idk hw hes doing. i pray he doesnt create a mess! n then rush down to town to meet the guys for dinz. byeeeee

2010-05-10T01:34:00.001+08:00

Am lying on my bed blogging wif my BB cuz I'm so lazy to on my lappy n I can't sleep! Will edit this post later when I'm up!!

So flashbackkk
Mon 3rd may
-dinz wif bf at amk where I encountered weird ass people tt freaked me out!!
-j8 for 'ironman 2'

Tues 4th may
-chill home day where bf bought yogurt for me((:
-dinz wif bf n mum

Fri 7th may
-bf picked me up frm skool n we headed to thomson plaza for starbucks n he packed ikea meatballs for me n I made luncheon meat sandwich for him((: BEST lunch I tell u! It was sho sweet(:
-over to pasir ris to see some pups at the farm. Wrong day to go cuz it was MAD HOT!
-tamp 1 for frolick n we went supermarket hopping (cold storage, jap n korean supermarket) buying nonsense!
-j8 for toriQ for dinz.. Back to bf's hse to chill

Sat 8th may
-headed to yishun for lunch wif bf
-went to see the pup n HEEHEEHEEE! MAD HAPPPYYYYY
-went "essentials shopping"
-back to my place to gym n then we baked carrot cake for mums' day((:

Sun 9th may
-didnt intend to see the bf but since both our fams weren't doing anything for mums' day I went over his place(:
-his cuz jus came back frm aus so JESTERS PIE!! Whooo pie+ikea meatballs for lunch is LOVEEE
-did my counselling essay(: n I'm proud to say I managed to churn out a 1.2k word essay in 2hrs!!
-watched vampire diaries, hw I met ur mother n 90210 wif bf
-his rents came home wif dinz for us. Had a nice meal wif his rents((: n they kept feeding me!! Tell u I'm nv hungry when I go to mr yang's hse!!
-bf, his mum n I watched 'trauma' together then home I wenttt

His mum so cute "if u(bf) marry shar ur kids eyes will be dam small" my eyes are tt small meh? LOL

Kk 5 days people!! WHOOOO will post pics up on me n bf's secret mission on sunday!! Hahaha SToKKEEDD times a MIL!! MOCHI MOCHI MOCHI!
Shall sleep nw!! BYEEEE

2010-05-05T20:24:00.003+08:00

mr yang n i are currently dog hunting!! so if yall noe anyone whos giving their dog up for adoption.. feel free to let me noe via my formspring k!!! http://formspring.me/foeshitzme !!! me n sean are open for choices!! in the mean time... feel free to ask me anything on my formspring!! its been pretty dead these days! cheerzzzk anyways im a lazy potato!! suppose to study but im dog hunting!! bf got me all excited for a new dog!! tsktsk! nw we currently hav our eye on either a teacup yorky or sheltand sheepdog (my old time fav dog since i was young!!)

yesterday me n bf spent a chill day at my place((: i made french toast for tea time.. then we had dinz together wif mumsie n stoned in front of the tv. i likeeyy chill days like this! nw hes back to work :( so lonely me will be spending my tmr at home studying. YES I WILL STUDY TMR!

anywhos... am off to showerrr! BYEE!

2010-05-04T15:44:00.012+08:00

am FINALL posting pics up!! OMG RECORD plssssss

1st may... town wif bf, khaliq+gf(:
2nd may.. jo n leanne's bday partaayyyeee at bf's hse (:
isnt she the cutest baby evveerrr!!!!
birthday boy turns 3!!!my new bestfren.. ariel the lil mermaid((:supermannnn yummy tumtum cake!!! (which i hav a few slices in my fridge!! WHOOO)the fam...spot sean's mini handbag! LOL currently waiting for dinz nw wif mr yang next to me watching random tv shows... i likeeyy days like this((: but when he leaves later i gotta study -.- sigghhh the beauty of such life is onli temporary...

but am so glad hes finally home(:

2010-05-04T15:27:00.003+08:00

hokkaayyy so... BOYFREN IS FINALLY HOME!!!!

yesyes i noe ive been disappearing... aiya but life of a uni student wat to doooo!! so many tests n assignments suddenly piled up to my head.. soooo tiring n all i wanna do is sleep! im suppose to be studying nw for my stupid test tmr but im blogging. A-mazing huh!!! n waitinf for mr sean yang to come over wif my yogurt n force me to study!! WEEHA!

so a flashback since friday nite

friday 30th april

-went to the airport at 11ish at nite to wait for bf to land

-studied a bit n bumped into khaliq'a gf so we sat n waited together talking abt nonsense

-they landed at 1 but mr yang onli came out at 2 plus!!? stupid convey belt was spoilt -.-

-he came home wif 6 dresses, 4 cropped tops, chocolates, pineapple tarts for MEEEE!! WHOOOO =D MAD HAPPY i tell u! nw my cupboard is spilling out clothes -.-

saturday 1st may... HAPPY 4th baby!! (:

-so we woke up late as usual.. LOL

-mumsie dropped me in town where i met bf((: finally get to go out wif him after 3 wks!! n u noe i havnt stepped out of my hse for a looonnggg time. stepping into crowded places freaked the shit out of me!!! OMYYYY

-went to search for jo n leanne's bday prezzie... ended up at toys r us wif khaliq n gf... gosh we 4 had a blast playing wif random toys!! LOL but then i realise toys r us has become sooooo empty!!! :(

-ben n jerry's for icecream at heeren... then back home to bf's hse where we sat n stoned.. watched kiddy channels wif jo... n home i wenttttt

the happy 1st bday balloon we got for leanne((: MAD PRETTY!!

sunday 2nd may

-woke up... wrapped the prezzie n mumsie dropped me at bf's hse

-helped to do some party prep wif his fam... omg his mum makes the BEST sweet potato kueh!!!!

-i stood by the plate jus stuffing my face like maddd(: YUMMM

-soon the hse was filled wif adults n kids running around... icecream chef people came to make icecream... crepes... balloon sculptures n face painting!!

-i swear i had a BLLASSSSSTTTTT! n everyon could tell i was enjoying myself! LOL

-eh i Do LOVE kids parties okaayy!! so innocent n fun! n i always look forward for the YUM TUM TUM CAKE which was OMYYYMAMA ORGASMIC I TELL U!!

-basically i sat n ate the whole dam day! cake.. cupcakes.. pastries... 4 mini cups of icecream.. crepes.. kueh.. aiya any food i saw i jus ate!! LOL

-then around the evening kiddies left then the big kids (darren, zx n chloe) came.. where i ate somemore! HAHA

-on the plus side to all my eating... bf's sis said i lost weight!! WHOOOO HAPPY

-played wii... the usual nonsense wif them n home we went...

my lil mermaid balloon sculpture!! CUTE RITTEEE! OMG she even has BOOBS!!!!

k shall do a pic post on the kiddies party after this post... BRB!!

2010-04-21T22:46:00.003+08:00

busy busy week!! hav been loaded wif 3 assignments this week n hence i havnt been blogging. 1 major psych essay on personality drained n shot me in the chest i swear!! im soooo glad i got over it nw(: next week should be a breeze wif the last week of lectures! YAY!! =D

bf has been away.. update... 10 more days till he comes home!!!! WHOOOOO x) excited pants!!! he comes back on our 4th but we are jus keeping it simple wif a nice dinz at either fish n co (1st place we had dinz together) or something else. oh n to hunt for prezzies for his niece n nephew cuz the next sunday is their bday n guess whos invited!!!! heehee x) i always get exicted over childrens parties!! i mean cmon.. its alcohol free!!! innocent fun! HAHAHHAA plus frm wat bf told me its gonna be a crepe n icecream paarrttaayyyee!!! HELL YEAH!

k getting back on my weight... apparently ive lost weight?! HEEHEE so happyyyy!!! a short span of 1 week i managed to drop 2kgs! nw even i eat like a pig... idk where my food goes cuz i still manage to maintain my weight. hmmm... k im 1-2kgs away frm my dream weight!! (: HAPPY PANTS!

on the down side of all this.. ive been so "busy" lazing around n rushing assignments out ive yet to see my zirca fam for like 3 weeks!!? plus im on a no clubbing streak at least till next week! i want newton dinz n satay plssss babies!!!!!

decided to post these 2 pics up frm ben's farewell chalet waayyyy back in feb!! i like hw zx is happily smiling behind me n bf! HAHAA. oh we were playing indian poker btw.

oh n i thot this group pic is sooo cutee! like 1 big happy family(: k my this wkend will be left studying! cuz it hit me veri hard recently tt exams are like in a mth n 1 wk!!? HOLY MCGEEEZZZ! but i realli cant wait to finish this skool sem. hated it to da maxxx! idk y also but yeaa! oh but on the brighter note.. i onli hav to sit for 2 exams!! n 1 is 40 mcqs!!? can my life get better plss!! heeee

ok nw jus waiting for the bf to call n im gonna crash. morning tut in the morning. aarrgghh sometimes im amazed at myself for managing to wake up at 7am for morning tuts! HAAA! BYYEEE!

2010-04-12T02:46:00.003+08:00

jungle boy steps into the jungle tmr...
i miss ur silly faces u always give me. i miss putting my hands on ur cheeks n kissing u. i miss the weird random noises u make out of the blue n i call u psycho! lols... i miss u baby...
starting to get real cranky wif such lil communication wif the bf. i mean there are times where im fine.. but then there are times i feel so empty.. lost n upset. like i always ask myself this question "is it fair tt there are always external forces keeping the one i love away frm me?" sighh.. its infuriating but its his job. but def i can say proudly tt im doing so much better than the previous 2 trips he was away.

anyways over the wkend instead of studying.. ive been in bed most of my days either sleeping catching up on sleep as last wk was hectic packed wif tests n assignments.. or sitting my laptop on my lap n catching up on 90210 n the L word. its been 2 yrs since i last watched the L word n i totally forgot abt it till i chanced upon it yesterday. got heaps of shows i wanna catch up on but yet i got a 1500 essay on personality due in 2 wks. ive yet to research btw. jus went to the library n got 2 ref bks but its sitting on my table waiting for my to digest it bit by bit. urggg DRAAAGGG

k la but if i keep myself busy wif all my shows n stupid essay n skool work.. time will past faster n this time the bf is busier than the other 2 trips so time will past faster for him too! realli cant wait for him to come back wif all my instant noodles n snacks!! heeheee (: tts the fatty side of me. but wif my weight gg down recently n my will power getting stronger to say no to food.. i think i will resist all the crap i asked him to get for me.

lunched wif the fam at crystal jade in the arvo n i resisted dimsum!! wah dam proud of myself plss! even my fam thot i was weird. n i realli hate it when they try to make me eat when im on this strict diet of mine. gaahh

k back to the L word.. then im off to bed! BYE!

2010-04-11T05:10:00.004+08:00

this girl.. who is veri sad tts y she is giving her this face...
realli misses her cheeky boy :(hws the instant noodle vending machine + fried shilin like chicken chop + hot showers in the taiwan camp treating u? wish i was in taiwan wif u!! k nt the army trainings part but jus being by ur side esp sleeping on ur chest. it was comfy btw esp when i was running a temp n u were watching me sleep. miss u so much baby. but thankfully it will be ur last trip for the yr. (lets hope so k!!) take care alrightyyyy! i love u PEH

ps.. i realised my previous post had soooo many spelling errors!! omg! k pardon me.. but i cbf editing it!

off to wach 90210 again! n yes im still awake! its 5.30am...

2010-04-10T20:40:00.003+08:00

flashbacckkkk

1st april thursday- happy 3rd baby!!

-S was off frm work so we headed down to town together... he got inked!

-cuz our day started off late... his inking took up most of the arvo..

-headed to dinz wif my fam since it was grandma's bday... S came along too! 2nd april friday

-day started off dam late for some reason. i guess me n S were jus shit tired!!

-town to walk around n SOMEONE did some retail therapY! wahlao i havnt shopped since feb!!? (k no wait i lied.. i did online shopping!)

-dinz at newton wif the zirca fam(kerry, karan n luke idk where william went!) bumped into tati baby too!

-over to gusttimo for dessert n me, S n luke headed to zirca 1st

-zirca as usual((: n the usuals getting bullied n teased by the bouncers! TSK esp nw wif kenneth being so buddy wif S.. urrgggg

3rd april saturday

-late day again cuz of the nite partying... me n S wanted to watch clash of the titans but knew town was gona be so full n all since its a wkend

-so amk we went instead n watched it!

-lovely sushi dinz be4 tt n dessert

4th april sunday

-it was a fam/frens day!!

-popiah at my place wif the fam n S came over after his dimsum wif his boss n all

-baked a lemon cake wif S for the bbq at S's place at nite but got hijacked by my fam -.-

-so towards the evening we left to go his hse for the bbq... set eveyrthing up n all

-as usual the guys (zx, darren, chloe, matthew, winston, jiajun, clement, melvin) will be an hr late! TSK i thot onli girls were fashionably late!

-finally my bbq cravings has been satisfying! food + company was greattt!! oh plus alot of dirty talk abt sausages n saggy burnt marshmellows! LOL (ask darren abt tt!)

back to skool wk.. where i was loaded wif assignments+tests.. when friday came i was FREEEE

9th april friday-the day bf leaves for tw.. :(
-after counselling test.. i was a happy bumble bee!!
-headed down to town to fep
-oh n i finally had tom n toms coffee! i think its fantabulous!!(:
-S came to join me after... trust me he didnt hav a pleasant time wif me squeezing his hands until i was gonna break it! LOL
-sore all over.. we went for dinz together.. n home we went his he had to do some last min packing n all
-the kids (leanne n jo) were home.. cutesies pies i tell u!! havnt seen them for so long n when they saw me.. they smiles n waved! lol
-leanne stretched her hands out for me to carry her.. jo came to sit on my lap!
-fever attacked me along the way to i slept on S's chest while he watche youtube -.-
-i left around 10ish n it was gdbye bf for 3 wks.. sighh
k la on the plus side i get my tw instant noodles n alot of rubbish snacks! whoooo! and its most prob gonna be his last trip for the yr! n he comes back on our 4th mth!(: so something to look forward to!

the zirca fam is heading to zirca tonite. but im home! im bored but too lazy to get my butt out of the hse. see tts the prob when bf leaves!! i become lazier.. all i wanna do is sleep. cuz he always drags me out!

idk y these few days my appetite has shrank like a hELL lott! i can survive on 1 meal a day or nt eating at all!! i mean its gd but yet weird?? LOL my every dream! n yes i am losing weight faster nw! WHOO HAPPY SHITTTS!

k off to shower n since im soooo bored.. i might remove my extensions! (: or maybe i should do tt next wk n get my hair dyed again... hmmm

2010-04-01T00:30:00.003+08:00

the story of orion's belt

1 pic today cuz i realli hate blogging wifout pics. anyways this was last last sunday at gusttimo wif S(: food there isnt as fantastic as their icecream n soooo nt worth the money. but anyways it was a great day wif him as usual(: he forced me to study.. then had nice lunch n dinz together!! then rite this bf of mine always got something sneaky up his sleeve. say "eh baby i go toilet!" toilet in china or wadd! take 20mins!!? yea then he came back wif a small bag wif 'Swarovski' written on it. the ring on my finger.. yea he got tt for me(: my cutesie i tell u! 3 starts symbolises the orion's belt in the sky. the 3 aligned stars tt keep us connected esp when hes away in another country. i love u baby(:

today was spent wif twin talking cock n laughing abt stupid things. we merry-go-around town jus finding parking space cuz she drove today. fking funni!! study plans failed so we ended up catching up on life n all. realli miss her so much i tell u!! at the same we bumped into sai+natassia, rachel+kimberly n others along the way. her gf came in the end to join us for a bit. nice catch up session. n realli hate tt we are in diff courses nw. sighhhh :( but am glad tt doesnt stop us frm talking cock with starbucks n waffles(:

n HAPPY 3rd @squidthesean ((:shall jus write 4 simple words to u.. i love u PEH!!

cant wait for our looonnggg awesome wkend ahead!! YEAHHH!!!

am on the fone wif squidy nw. BYEEE!

2010-03-31T01:03:00.003+08:00

AM FINALLY BACK TO BLOGGING!!
k ive decided nt to be so lazy anymore. cuz honestly ive lost track on wat ive done over the past wks!! my blog used to help me rmb wat i did n all.

anyways ive got SOOOOOOOOOOOO looonngg overdue pics to upload since cny!! but ive become lazy cuz blogger takes a motherfking long time to upload my pics!! cuz the pics are taken by my dslr n its bigger n all so it takes longer. the i realise y i dun update my blog anymore!! LOL

so i shall start wif the more recent ones. this was last fri(26th march) at Zirca for niteclass with my zirca babies((: n obviously we always hav a shit load of fun!! oh n it was also inquizzy's debut at zirca. yes hes become 1 of their resident djs too!!
these pics are taken frm kerry n william's cam. tts y i can blog them up without being so time consuming! zirca-ing wif my babies are always fun! but we always somehw disappear.. but at the end of the nite find each other again! LOL major loves for yall((: oh n nw S has become so buddish wif kenneth(zirca's bouncer) always talking abt army n all tt crap -.- so i will go hug misuzu n she will pester me for cupcakes. LOL this friday AGAIN!! (:

k so lets see... since S came back from brunei.. we hav caught 'alice in wonderland in 3D'.. 'dear john' and jus on sat nite we watched 'hw to train your dragon in 3D' MUST WATCH i tell u!! so heartwarming n all((:

flashback of my recent wkend.. it was a lazy wkend since friday me n S partied till we dropped dead. LOL chill chill wkend but we decided to head out on sat nite for a triple date wif jin+kellyn, khaliq+gf in town. gusttimo icecream n we had ALOT of laughs inbetweens!! realli had fun! then caught 'hw to train your dragon'.. but besides our fri n sat nite.. we spent sunday lazing at home wif pizza delivery((:

monday(29th) i was sick again -.- tt cutie bf of mine came by to see me wif yummy tumtum ipoh horfun n red tea longan dessert frm changi village. yea he flew down frm changi jus to see if i was okay. me, S n my sis ended up suppering together. cutesie i tell u!!

tuesday (30th) study break so i stayed home n actually studied!! yepperss proud of myself((:

tmr will be study day wif twin!! my goodness u hav no idea hw much ive missed her!!! the last time i saw her was at clark quay 2 wks ago where we screamed, ran to each other, jumped n hugged each other like crazy! stoked for tmr((:

loonnnggg wkend this wk!! me n S planned our wk already((: thurs is our 3rd mth so its gonna be out reliving moments together. fri movie wif khaliq+gf.. zirca at nite wif my babies(: sat S will be helping me wif sociology... sun bbq at his place(: YAY!!

oh n mumsie's coming back tmr from china wif GG season 3!! YES YES YES!!!! oh n the whole series of sex n the city!! WHOOOOO(:

k on the down side.. S is leaving for tw next fri again!! plus side.. its his last trip of the yr so im realli excited.. plus i get my tw instant noodles!! WHEEE =D hes gonna bring back 1 carton for me... 1 carton for kenneth n another for his fam!! LOL im gonna live on tw instant noodles for a mth i swear!!

sorri for the loonngg wordy post! but ive been too deprived frm blogging. LOL k gd nite LOVES!

2010-03-16T22:41:00.002+08:00

ive realli cut down on my blogging. cant help it.. ive become a fatty lazy potato

anyways ive removed my tagboard since there were some hoohaa n shit. k watever. whether ur on my side or making accusations abt me... i dun care. jus tt if u wanna ask me anything jus head over to www.formspring.me/foeshitzme

ive been such a fatty these days. fking hormones!! i hate my pms!!! URG n i kinda hav been a monster to my poor bf. hes jus so patient wif me tts y hes amazing. i love u baby! though work has been robbing him away frm me too. but then again he always tries his best to make time for me whenever he can((:

uni has been hectic? well nt realli. rather im dam relaxed. haha which i should start stressing!!!! UNI UNI!! 1st yr psych wa sso overwhelming. but my this lazy ass refuse to get up n do shit! sighhh even my bf cant make me. i need WILLPOWER!!!

2010-03-10T14:34:00.000+08:00

Currently blogging via my bb.. I'm dying in skool!!!

Bf is finally back!!!!! Went to the airport on tues to pick him up at 2ish am. But while waiting for him, I did some productive studying for psych!! YEAAHH! So proud of myself!! (:

Yesterday we went to 313 for dinz.. RAMEN is LOVEE! Swear our apetitte has shrunk soooo much!! Shared 1 bowl of ramen n we both were full! Then went for frolick, bumped into familiar faces n gusttimo for ice-cream after tt((: YUM TUM TUM, awesome day we had(: so nice to finally be able to go out wif him after 21 days! :D

In some stupid effective writing lect nw. Dam pri skool plsss! Plus I've done it last 2 sems already. I'm literally gonna punch someone!!! K nvm another 45mins!!! Then xlb wif bf((: heeheee HAPPY!!! :D

K la enough.. Random post but I'm soooo bored! Pics soon I PROMISE!

2010-03-08T19:29:00.003+08:00

being a psych student definitely has its benefits(:

so i woke up feeling realli crappy. its bad enough tt im already suffering frm dam low self confidence n i had to read some nasty shit? well im nt a person who gets affected by wat people say esp anonymous people who do nt personally noe me. but becuz am suffering frm dam low self confidence these days.. yea it bugs me. i dragged my ass to skool n counting the mins as it went by

but wat kept me awake was tt we were talking abt personality today. n today's lect was so wat i needed to hear. he said tt "y people say nasty things abt other people n put them down is becuz... they themselves hav committed similar "sinful acts" as the person they are saying nasty things abt. so to make themselves feel better... they deliberately put others down jus to cover up their own guilt n say oh so n so is wayyyy worse than me! so im nt tt bad waddd!" i cant help but agree wif this statement. wat a disgusting human act but its human nature isnt it? everyone does it 1 way or another jus to comfort ur own self. this was totally applicable to me this morning.

so yeppers! hope this helps those suffering frm low self confidence jus becuz of criticisms by judgmental brainless shitheads out there. this statement made me hav such a better look on things today. plus who are u to be judging me when everyone has their own tainted past? mine jus happened to be exposed tts all. uneducated n rough speaking poor lil shitheads. didnt ur parents ever tell u nt to go around being rude to people? oh wells... karma is a bitch.

wats even better... BF IS FINALLY COMING HOME!!! YAY =D will be gg to pick him up frm the airport later(((: cant wait seriously!!!

oh due to my lack of updates.. u might wanna follow me on twitter!! http://twitter.com/foeshitzme im a twitter fanatic!! i tweet every sec of my life!!!! (: so jus add me!

k am off!!! wanna say shit abt me? go ahead.. if tt makes ur own self feel better by putting people down.. go ahead. jus tt i gotta say.. awww u sad poor lil shitheads!! :(

2010-03-06T23:39:00.005+08:00

wayyy back in 5th feb!!
luke's bday celebration...

idk y blogger doesnt allow me to post up the rest of the pics! once it stops being a bitch will post the rest up!!!

2010-03-06T23:20:00.002+08:00

thursday 4th march
-a veri impromptu thurs nite/fri morning!!
-got a call frm kenneth (zirca's bouncer) at 3.30am... "kerry is drunk!! can she crash ur place cuz she left her stuff at her frens car"
-so a drunk kerry knocked out immediately on my bed... i went to skool n came back at 12 n she was still sleeping!! LOLs

friday 5th march
-so after being such a lazy pokerface.. i finally got my ass out of my hse besides skool
-class ended early.. so i rushed home to see my drunk babygirl.. woke up n headed all the way to east coast to get her stuff frm kevin.. then she dropped me at my place n home i went to sleep
-woke up at 6ish n i was late!!!
-rushed n all.. went to river valley to pick kerry up.. n headed to william's for his bday
-everyone was there!! (: old familiar faces n new faces!! omg n palmer was there too!!! someone i knew since 13!! omg
-then me, kerry, karan, luke, zhiwei, palmer, ryan n a few others headed down to zirca around 11ish
-alice in wonderland theme party n me n kerry dressed up as tweedle dee n dum!! but no one realli dressed up n some shittyness happened along the way so me n kerry walked to the bridge n chilled
-n OMG i SAW SS!!! heeheee missed him sooooo much!!!
-headed back to zirca around 12ish... the usual disturbing by the bouncers (kenneth, misuzu, melvin) ive missed all of them so much!! think gg down alternate wks is quite good la!
-dk BTRAITS was ROCKIN!!!! OMG OMG n shes BLOODY FKING HAWWWTT!
-jaggerbombs frm wei.. champagne frm jimmy. had pre drinks earlier a william's anyway!
-partied till 3.30 n me n kerry left cuz we were too sleepy
-smashin time at zirca as usual((: LOVE YALL!!!!

k i noe my blog has been sooooo dull!! but i jus started 1st sem uni n its quite daunting realli. thank goodness for my bf's encouragments n all since he has gone through uni be4. psych is no joke!! so much shit but on the plus side i onli need to sit 2 exams!! am taking 4 subs but 2 are jus tests n all. so its gonna be quite managable i guess(:

no pics.. lazy to upload!! omg i need to stop this laziness!!

on the plus side... bf is finally coming home on tues(((: YAY!!! shall do a pic post be4 i abandon my blog for the next few days. heehee x)

2010-02-28T22:29:00.006+08:00

ive been a lazy bugger who refuse to upload my blog. heh x) maybe cuz ive been home all these while tt i dun feel tt anything exciting has been happening.

uni officially starts tmr for me. yepperrss!! 1st yr psych here i come!! kinda stoked but i noe i will dread it when skool terms starts! but then again.. i onli go skool for 20 days then i got a break for a week(: so aint tt bad but yeaaa. am feeling the stress already!! UH OH!!! :(

anyways im wayyyy behind in uploading my pics!! TSK!! i shall let the pics do the talking(:

30th jan...

1st feb... me n S's 1st mth!!

im such a failure!! feb is ending n im jus uploading pics at the end of jan n start of feb!!! my goodness!! k more pics coming ur way sooonn!! (:

ps... 45mins more till its me n S's 2nd mth!!!! (:

k on the fone wif him nw... shall give him my undivided attention nw. BYEEEE

2010-02-21T21:05:00.004+08:00

flashbaccckkkkk.. over the CNY period!

sunday 14th feb

HAPPY VDAY N CNY!!! (:

-visiting at both sides of the fam.. yea yea boring as hell

-my fam is jus nt like REGULAR fams la. we dun gamble... n i dun talk much to my cousins.

-HUGE age gap maybe

-then i "ran away frm home" (quoted by my mum. HAHA) for 1 day

monday 15th feb

-me n S went to watch 'valentines day' at cathay around 4ish

-great great movie. i find it hw amazing hw the director managed to link all the actors n actresses together 1 way or another.

-oh be4 movie we went for bnj (: but i still prefer gusstimo waaayyyy more!

-after the movie we went starbucks.. chilled for a while then headed over to his hse to visit his fam(:

-the guys were there too... his mum made this yummilicious mushroom soup!! OMG TO DIE FOR!!

-then yuzhen made some dip n all.. me n darren happily sat around the table munching on carrot, celery n cucumber sticks dipping wif the dip. HAHA

-wii as usual... watched a bit of GI joe wif S's nephew sitting so close to me. HAHA MAD CUTE

-i went off around 2ish?

tuesday 16th feb

-a veri chill day for me n S

-he came over for dinz wif my fam n i

-he went through the whole "interview" wif my uncle. it was dam funni!!

-at nite he flew off :(

k the rest of the days.. ive been stuck at home. refusing to step out of my comfort zone. i was home bound. gym.. sleep... watch tv... call S.. realli lifestyle of a pig but i LOVE IT!

saturday 21st feb

-visited some fam thingy for lunch n all...

-home i went n received a few calls frm my party babies n we had our sat nite all planned out((:

-so me n kerry baby onli went to zirca around 2plus!? yea DAM EARLY plss

-but it was soooooooooo worth gg down!! BASS AGENTS WERE DA SEX!! HELL YEAHHH!

-we got soooo high. jaggberbombs frm my godfather... chamapagne... tequila shots.. cock sucking cowboy. gosshhh n i must thank my babygirl for all the tequila shots n cock sucking cowboy!! I LOVE U!

-zirca closed around 4ish close to 5.. so we (kerry, karan, luke, trevor, wenjun, jimmy n this girl) had breaky at macss(:

-home at 6ish.. i flew onto my bed n almost passed out but i called S to talk to him for a while(:

-yet another AWESOME ZIRCA NITE wif my babies(:

oh i must say something.. some people are jus so fking fake. as fake as a "chanel" bag. sometimes i feel like punching her fking face!! u think ur tt awesome!?! well HELL NO! ur a fake fake cheating bitch who dun deserve such a nice boyfren at all. love realli IS blind. cant believe u can be there for me.. n then do such a shit thing?! fake bitches dun deserve such frens around u.

i feel so much better after ranting. oh oh n today i was a good good girl(: ate veggies n fruits onli!! heehee x) k nw im hungry but cannot cannot!!!!

2010-02-20T01:50:00.004+08:00

17days...

its friday n im home... k its close to 2am which means its saturday but normally at this time.. me n kerry baby will be on zirca's dancefloor/cage partying up a storm. even my whole fam is shocked im home on a fri nite!!!! *GASP* being stuck at home for 4 days hav made me soooooo lazy to get my ass out of my hse. ive become so insecure to step out of the hse already. UH OHHH.

i MISS @kerryloh !!! :(

but i realli miss my zirca family + the bouncers + the bar staff + currypuff for supper + dj marcus' music!!! WITHDRAWAL SYNDROMES!! but yet these days im soooo lazy n get tired out dam easily clubbing. i rather sit n chill rather than be on the dance floor. i guess im getting old? LOLS or rather sick of clubbing? idk but i miss everyone!!! :(

n jus nw i got a call frm R.. was jus thinking abt him last nite n he called!!! somehw im suddenly missing all my guy pals.. like i used to be so close to them n nw its like a bit drifted? maybe i should use my 1 last week of hol to catch up!!! (:

anyways am finally stepping out of the hse in 10 hrs time!!! some fam lunch thingy. eeyyerr.. k then after tt im coming home n GYM!! my diet has been an EPIC FAIL! sigghhh... i shall water diet on mon. hope i can make it!!! LOLs

still missing @squidthesean!!!!! :( u noe wat my bf is doing in brunei!!? watching cable tv!! sleeping!! eating!! OMG puiii laaa! sgp cannot do all this huh!!? must take my bf away frm me :( realli hope he moves camp in march or something. dun wan him to go taiwan again n leave me!! :( but thankgoodness hes staying in camp this time round. we still call n text each other everyday(: better than nth...

k shall crash nw. got this shitty throbbing headache!!! :( NITE

2010-02-17T01:03:00.003+08:00

21 days... till ur back again
so the boyfren is flying off in 2hrs time AGAIN. fking hell.. k this post will be veri angry. cuz rite nw im jus a mad bitch. so filled wif hatred abt everything in this world. i jus wanna scream n shout or punch someone so hard tt my knuckles hurt too. he jus came back 2 weeks ago n nw hes off again. wats worse is tt when he comes back on the 9th of march.. he stays for a mth n he flies off again to taiwan. seriously can u imagine hw mad i am!!?

k but i go through this phase... i get mad for a while.. then i calm down n im proud of wat he does. he makes me proud to be his girlfren wif wat he does n all. nt many guys can take up this responsibility n hav this much courage to actually work in the army. esp when he can easily strike a conversation wif my uncle or male frens who was in the army be4.

but wat he say is rite la. when hes actually back... we create AMAZING memories together. if u wanna noe wat he did for me on vday... well i cant say it but it was jus MAGICAL! he gave me a vday which i hav always pictured hw a perfect vday would be. if i were a guy n i was planning for my gf.. he totally took my idea n gave it to me. but no he didnt take my idea but he planned everything so nicely n perfectly. i had the best nite evverrr. no words can describe hw brightly i smiled.. hw blissful n happy i was. it was an expensive vday on his part. but we both had so much fun n we were truely happy. im glad we managed to spend vday be4 he flew off. these memories created tt nite was so magical n memorable. it will be brought wif us for the rest of our lives together.

so this was my vday prezzie to him. matching bracelets. mine says "sean's" his says "shar's". n i did a video for him which i jus gave him jus nw. im glad my crazy dancing n heart felt words touched his heart in every way.
baby i miss u already. im irritated n annoyed. i do feel like screaming at ur face nw. but i noe when i see u.. i jus cant bring myself to cuz ur face jus brightens up my day.. cheers me up n makes me forget abt all the unhappiness n sadness. baby the memories we created on our 1st vday together will always be locked away in my heart. n when i miss u like crazy i will jus sit down quietly n let my mind run back to tt veri special day. where u held me in ur arms when i cried like a baby. getting all emotional becuz of moet n chandon. no it wasnt the champagne. but my heart was ripping apart at tt moment. all i could do was cry in ur embrace. but after all the crying.. u always noe wat to say to make me feel better n smile again.

u noe hw much u mean to me... i hate to see u go again. nt seeing u for 21 days when ive been seeing u everyday for the past 2 weeks. i wonder when will i pluck up the courage to actually send u off? i guess never. its jus too painful to watch u walk away frm me.

k to many it may be jus 21 days n im jus being a baby abt it. but when u actually experience it.. gawwdd its heart wrenching n SOOOO PAInful.

im torn apart nw... waiting for u to come back n sew me back together. i miss you already baby.. take care okay. n i love u like CRAZY. u noe tt... forever n ever.. forever in my heart. iloveyou

2010-02-16T23:48:00.002+08:00

31st jan...
when S came back frm brunei..

k wanted to upload 30th's pics too.. but blogger decided to be a bitch.. PFFTT k so a short pic post!!

2010-02-14T02:17:00.005+08:00

1st up... HAPPPY CNY n VALENTINES DAY!!!!! k this will be the ever 1st vday im gonna spend it wif someone i love!!! heeeheee x) im more stoked for vday than cny.. k la the onli incentive of cny is the MOOLAH!! but other than tt.. u jus get FAT!! im getting so annoyed by my weight nw. URRGG k nvm tues i shall start gg back to my gym routines!! YESSS GO ME!

oh n i received my vday prezzies frm S already!! another BIG bouquet of roses!!! 11 roses to be exact!! cus it symbolises "my one and onli" heeheee(: ive receieved 3 bouquets frm him in a short span of 1mth plus!!? HE CUTIE! n this teddybear he got frm ocs.. which has both our names sewed on both sides of the pocket!! MAD CUTE!!! i love u baby!! n i hope u loved ur prezzie frm me to u too(((: k apparently he has more surprises??!! TSK this boy!! hes always putting so much effort into everything making me such a fortunate n happy girl. realli i cant ask for anymore.
thursday 11th feb

-S had a 1/2 day frm work.. so we met at 4ish at bugis... shisha-ed((:

-its like memories for both of us. since tt was the 1st place we went together when i 1st met him((:

-over to wheelock to collect my dress n meet william for dinz... went skinny pizza n dam was it YUMMY TUMTUM!!

-william left us to go holland... we walked around ion... tt bf of mine did some last min cny shopping... we went riverisland

-k classic scenario: boyfrens in the changing room.. girlfrens standing outside each door waiting. HAHA i found it DAM FUNNI

-yea mostly guys shopping!? i came up wif a theory: GIRLS SHOP ONLINE!! YEAAHHH

-gusstimo for icecream n DAMMM it was.. OH SO YUMMY!!!!!

-went home after a loonngg day

friday 12th feb-so it was a lazy day... S came over my place to meet me.. then mumsie dropped us at his hse

-frm 2pm to 4.20am.. i was at his place

-in the arvo we babysat his niece n nephew... watched tv.. played wii... yea lazy lazy dayyy!!

-i had dindin wif his fam... then waited for the guys to come n kerry joined us too((:-the guys were suppose to come at 8 but ended up coming at 11ish?!! pfftt... kerry... zongxing... aaron.. melvin.. shaun.. rouyu.. yu zhen... darren.

-prata at jalan kayu.. then back to S's place where we played wii.. rockband.. street fighter..

-left around 4ish...

k hav a good cny n vday yall!!!!! off to bed i GOOOOO!!

2010-02-11T00:59:00.010+08:00

flashbackkkk

29th jan wif my party babies(:

Reunion dindin(:

hollandv.fosters.zirca

pls dun ask me wat my crazy boy is doing SOOO SEXY! YUMMYlove my zirca family((: forever n ever!!i love u babygirl!! forever n ever(:kerry says tt statue thingy behind looked like karan!! HAAA love lovessss times INFINITY!! luke didnt noe wat a hickey was.. so kerry had to show him! LOLS then we decided to give ourselves a hickey!! HAHAHAHAbrotherly loveeeee(:

k more pics soon!! BYE

2010-02-11T00:41:00.003+08:00

so my boyfren is gonna leave me again :( back to brunei for another 17 days when he jus came back like 12 days ago!!? dam bullshit.. but wat to do.... i gotta survive all this. but am more than happy to as long as hes safe(: plus im gonna hav "custody" of Cyler(his iPhone) for the 17days. he says "CYler is gonna be disfigured by u wif all the bling n pink covers!!" HEEHEE x)my net has been fking slow so its gonna be a while till i spam this space wif TONS of pics!!! sorri ahh... but deal wif me. heh x)

monday 8th feb

-finally did my fugly nails.. my fingers are this dark purple n toes are BLUE!! heehee

-went out wif mummy to do some shopping... then to fep to meet kerry baby n karan(:

-did a lil more shopping n heeheee they noe wat i got! ;)

-over to holland to hav dindin wif william.. issac n cherlene

-kerry's mum sent me home(:

-waited for S baby to come over n i bought dindin for him.

-played taptap on his Cyler(his iphone)

tuesday 9th feb

-stay home day till the evening?

-me n S were lazy to go town so we went amk

-dindin at his fav chinese restaurant for awesome yummlicious duck

-dessert at some chinese place.. (ICY IC!!)

-caught 'i hate valentines day' gosh we had a blast laughing our assess off

-then home we wenttt

wednesday 10th feb

-S baby was at neesoon camp which was near my place

-so he woke me up at 10.30.. dragged my tired ass to get ready.. met him n we went TOWN

-DIM SUM at crystal jade!! our 1st lunch together on a weekday!! cuz normally its impossible for him to drag my ass out of my hse earlier than 2pm. heehee

-ate like cows.. full like crazzyyy!! FATNESS

-went to buy havaianas cuz he was being a sulky boy since he was told during lunch time tt he was gg brunei.. hope tt cheered u up a lil baby!

-then off to camp he went n i walked around town myself till i got tired

-causeway wif mummy to do grocerry shopping n home i went to KO on my bed

-around 8 plus S baby came over for dinner((: so he finally met my mother! funaayyee

-then sis n bf came over for dinner... it was a classic gathering..

-oh n they all(mum, sis, S baby n sister's bf) all using iPhone. im the onli BB user -.-

-after dinner.. S talked to my mummy n all.. then we left for macs!!

-twister fries n mcflurry!! MY GAWWDD FATTIES FOR LIFE!

-hanged around then home he went

i miss u already!! eyyerr POOTS :( k off to watch GLEE!! BYE

2010-02-10T00:38:00.004+08:00

k so i havnt blogged in a loonnggg time! im losing track of my pics already. OMG even S jus said FINALLY ur blogging!!

anyways exams hav jus ended last fri... so pretty much ive been partying non stop over my 1st weekend. so lets start wif friday

friday 5th feb
-town wif vanessa n jollin n met for christine a while
-went for frolick at cine... then roamed around cine.. waited for S to come... then darren came.. kris
-pasta mania... me n S left for 1 degree 15.. YEA ALL THE WAY THERE!!

-luke's farewell wif my babies... kerry, karan, william, luke, zhiwei, deanna, june, nicole, bordin, issac k a whole lot more
-surprised early bday celebration for luke since he was enlisting the next day n he would prolly be in camp on his bday
-so a few of them left... left S, my zirca fam(kerry, karan, luke, william) zhiwei, rachel, evan, deanna n a few others... we decided to get amsterdam n chill n drink oh n camwhore!!!
-oh then we played FUZZY DUCK!! fking fun i tell u!! all the funni words tt came out
-then S n kerry n i shared a cab wanting to go home. k by then me n kerry were quite high.. we were singing dam loudly in the cab n screaming... S n the cab driver found us dam entertaining
-then we decided to make a trip to ZIRCA!!! heeheeee x)
-had more drinks n kerry got "kidnapped" away as usual.. thank goodness for S being wif me(:
-so me n S partied away at zirca till 4ish n he dropped me home.. he left for camp

saturday 6th feb
-k so the veri exhausted n worn out me n S went to the airport around 3ish to send vanessa baby off
-off we went to sentosa for ben's farewell
-it was clean fun when the sun was still shinning... the guys played beach soccer n frisbee while the 3 gfs (me, rouyu n chloe) sat n chilled
-dinner at sakae.. n then back we went to siloso beach resort
-k tts when things got pretty fucked up!! HAHA all thxs to S's gf (ahem me!)
-i kept saying "eh EVERYONE take shots!!" while i sat at 1 corner nt drinking much
-till some of them noticed i wasnt drinking so they gave me shots
-we got a few complains so we all moved to silosa beach n things got crazier since everyone was pretty wasted n all...
-some of the guys went skinny dipping... some drank more.. puked.. some ended up wif cuts n bruises on their arms n legs... omg it was MESSY shit
-oh n many gay moments too (shall upload pics soon)
-went back to the hotel n we all crashed... drank dudes everywhere lying on the floor.. it was CLASSIC

sunday 7th feb
-so we all woke up... recalling wat happened last nite... looked through the pics frm my cam.. gosh we had a BLAST laughing n all
-checked out.. n off we went to vivo for lunch at carls jr(:
-the rest left... me n S stayed to do some cny shopping together
-at 1st it was quite a wasted trip... but after S got his ted baker jumper.. we started finding quite nice stuffs too
-got 2 pairs of heels tt day.. he bought a ted baker jumper, ck boxers, shoes n belt
-had a blast but we got tired after a while
-he dropped me off at charm's place for her bday
-it was great catching up wif EVERYONE!! (: its been too long

took like 500 over pics during my this weekend!! thank goodness for SASHA(:

wanted to upload 2 pics frm each day on this post but blogger is being a peesai!! A-NNOYING!
k am off to watch GLEE!!! BYE!

2010-02-01T21:31:00.003+08:00

weekend flashbackkk!!

friday 29th jan

-finally got my ass out of the hse to meet my partybabies for dindin at holland(: kerry, luke, william, karan, rachel, zhiwei, ryan n this guy

-fosters for some pre-drinks.. i started blasting electro music n UH OH!!!! impromptu decision to head to zirca. reunion wif my fam(kerry, luke, william, karan) but william didnt come in the end

-so 4 of us plus several others went to ZIRCA!! (:

-partied.. drama... omg but we had a blassttt

-the best part?! me n kerry met kenneth goh(owner of zirca who is my daddy's fren) again n he treated us to supper at lunar

-did u noe tt LUNAR HAS CARROT CAKE!! BAK KUT TEH!! MEEGORENG!! OMG we pigged out like crazy!! OMG

-i ate too much plus all the champagne n chivas i had to puke my food out!!

-early nite for all of us cuz we were poofed out.. but nevertheless.. zirca nites wif my fam are always FUN

*waiting on william for pics!!*

saturday 30th jan

-k so i slept at 5.45... 3hrs later.. i got a call frm S.. "baby i got someone to deliver ur present on my behalf. its outside ur door nw. go open!!"

-the veri sleepy n blur me.. wif hair all over my face.. wearing my pjs went to open the door. indeed my present was at my doorstep!! S came home(((:

-wif his luggages.. he stood be4 me.. omg i was in a daze but i was so happy to see him!!!

-changed n we headed down to chill for a bit till he left n we went home to sleep

-woke up... went to meet S... bought his boots.. went sim lim n i bought my CAMERA!!! nikon D3000 (: i was a mega happy girl!!! bf came home + the cam i always wanted!! OMG

-raffles city where we did a lil shopping... he bought jeans.. i bought shoes. we had a BLAST i tell u!! shopping wif S is jus so so fun!! his opinions n all.. my goodness(: i was truely happy tt day!

-suntec to meet the guys for dindin at astons.. desserts at gobi after where we over ordered but the desserrts were TO DIE FOR!

-back to S's place where we played wii!!! i whooped 4/5 officers in cooking mama!! until aaron managed to beat me!! TSK

-raving rabbits + rockband... i sucked at the drums. i shall stick to cooking mama

-home at 3ish?

sunday 31st jan

-over to S's place in the arvo to do some quality study...

-off we went to newton for a yummy tumtum dindin(: sambal stingray.. sambal kangkong... chicken wings.. satay n lala!! OMG

-S felt sick after dindin.. so we headed back.. but went to buy some ps3 n wii games then home we went to play!!! (:

-simply day but i had so so much fun training my hand eye coordination wif his wii. OMG IM ADDICTED!!!monday 1st feb

me n S's 1mth!!! love u baby!

-1st paper today.. i think i did okayyy

-S came to skool n picked me up n surprised me wif my 2nd bouquet of roses. this time it was peachy pinkish orangy idk wat colour but it was mad pretty(:

-didnt feel like gg town so we went to northpoint instead.. i was craving for choc souffle so bakerzin we went!!

-decided to eat dindin there.. caesar saland.. ham n cheese sandwich n choc souffle. YUM YUM i tell u!

-n they were giving out free samples on their new caramel, peanut butter n black forest cheesecake!! omg the caramel it DA BOMBS!!! everyone should try it at least once!! u will NV regret it!!!

-anyways S's fever came back.. so he sent me home n then went home. simple day but we had 3 awesome fun days((:

k he jus called((: GOOD NITE!

2010-02-01T00:00:00.002+08:00

HAPPY 1st (:

this 1st mth wif u has been awesome(: ive written so many letters n posts to u idk if ur getting sick of it. hahah! anyways... ur morning surprise was the best!! waking up after 3 miserable hrs of sleep.. getting a call n saying tt someone is outside to deliver my present for u.. i walked out in my pjs.. hair in a mess... in a dazed mode... onli to see u standing rite at my doorstep. baby it was unforgettable. i was the 1st person tt was on ur mind when u landed n u came wif ur huge luggages. ur jus beyond amazing.

im glad these 18 days are OVER n ur back hone safely. these 2 days spent wif u hav been filled wif alot of laughters n fun! ive got a new addiction: WII! lols(:

u noe hw much u mean to me... i cant emphasise tt enough. thxs for putting in so much effort jus to contact me n made me feel safe n secure even though u were up high in the mountains or braving the jungle. i love u so so much n im sooooo thankful ur in my life.

poor sick boy is down wif fever nw. oh n kerry baby jus wished "happy one month baby!" aww i love u sweetie!

k 1st exams in 14 hrs.. GOOD NITE! will update on my AWESOME times INFINITY weekend soon!!

ps.. i got my new cam!! i named it SASHA!! (: i was a HAPPY ONE on sat nite(:

2010-01-29T02:13:00.003+08:00

hey yalll!! its a friggin FRIDAY!! again!!! (:
2days till my baby comes home!!!! WHEEEE
so after being stuck at home for the past 5 days.. i hav decided to break out of my comfort zone n hav planned to go out tonite!!(friday) tonite's gonna be awesome cause im gonna be seeing my party babies!!! kerry baby, luke, karan, william n zhiwei!! STOKED TIMES A MILLION!! cuz i havnt seen the boys in AGGGESSS! n though i saw kerry last sat.. I MISS HER LIKE CRAZZYY! n for once we ARENT clubbing on a fri nite!! a nice din din at holland n chillout after(: YAY!

anyways i had a veri interesting nite fone call wif S. i started my hysterical nonsense (ps to him its nt nonsense cause tts wat made him fall for me. heeheee) hookaayy!! oh n my fam dam cute jus nw!!! heeheee

veri random.. but everyone MUST watch GLEE!!! (: its LOVE i tell u!!!

shal end wif... pounce tiger POUNCE!! heeheeeee x) onli S n kerry baby noeeeee

2010-01-27T00:08:00.003+08:00

4 days!!!!

to my dearest bf who is 464875955 miles away frm me nw...

baby im so thankful u are in my life. ive nv happier n more free. these 19 days uve been away.. its been hard, torturing n long. but look where we hav come. 4 more days till ur back!! =D n i noe its gonna be an amazing return! soooo loooking forward to see ur face when u see me... the reaction.. the hugs.. the kisses. ive missed u so so much.

u were up in the mountains.. in the jungle... yet u managed to find time n the freakin reception jus to talk to me. to comfort me n let me noe u were safe n well away frm me. u braved the swamp, river n "basked" in the rain in the jungle.. soaking wet... u still called to let me noe u were fine. hearing ur voice has nv comforted me this much. im jus so glad ur coming home already.

no doubt these days uve been away.. it did make us stronger. though i feel tt uve nv realli left the country since we always communicated 1 way or another. n we've had a few heart to hearts even while ur away frm me. baby ur reassurance always make me feel tt im the luckiest girl ever. when my cat was sick.. u were so concerned for her. u even wanted to accompany me to send her to the vet. u asked hw she was doing in 1 of ur letters. n when 1 of my babygirls was upset... we turned around in the cab n went down to her jus to make sure she was fine. u always asked hw she was doing n made sure she was fine. n when my other babygirl was unsure abt wat she should do.. u gave ur 2 cents worth on her situation n comforted her. baby ur so so amazing u noee! ur 1 of the most sensitive guys ive ever met. n im so glad ur mine(:

i asked him jus nw "baby if i suddenly get knocked down by a car or land myself in hospital.. wat would u do?" in his sweetest n most caring n concerned voice "i would fly back immediately to see u. n if i realli cant... i will send 1 of the guys to make sure ur fine for me" seriously.. wat more can i ask for frm him? his sense of urgency when it comes to me.. jus made it so much clearer tt i made the perfect choice to be wif him. he will always drop a text or call me when he wakes up 1st thing in the morning.. when he gets reception in the jungle/mountain.. he would always call me. even when hes dirty, muddy, sweaty as hell n smelly... the 1st thing he always does is to call me to let me noe hes back in camp safely.

baby ur my everything. i noe we would hav a tough road ahead of us.. but im sure wif our strength n love.. we will get pass everything. uve gained the approval of my 3 most important girls in my life.. n ive gained the approval of ur 3 most important guys in ur life. through the clear blue skies n stormy weathers.. i noe we will be holding onto each other no matter wad.

i love u SYSJ (:

2010-01-26T21:17:00.002+08:00

5 days!! WHEEE =D i can wave wif my 1 hand!! STOKED!

ive been home bound since sunday.. im gona pluck my hair out dam soon. wanna go out so badly but i noe my priorities-EXAMS! plus im lazy to change out of my fbts n tank top jus to go out. heh x) next week i will be out all week after exams(: S is gonna company me to study everyday!! wheeeeee =D

S has something sneaky up his sleeve planned for our 1mth. this is his hint "u can carry it everywhere u go n u can talk to it" like WADDD!? my goodness... im still stuck on the idea tt hes getting me a kitten. heh x) k its absurb but ive got wild guesses okaayy!

ive planned my wkend for the next 4 wks already!! heehee dam STOKED!!
but as for this week...
friday 29th jan- din din wif kerry baby n the boys at newton(:
saturday 30th jan- gym.. overnite study at the airport n wait for S to land!! =D
sunday 31st jan- study wif S in the arvo... din din wif S n maybe the guys! (:

friday 5th feb- exams end at 3.30... home.. din din wif S, vanessa n kerry baby.. ZIRCA!!
saturday 5th feb- chill day wif S... sentosa at nite
sunday 6th feb- cny shopping wif S((: chaota kid's bday at nite

STOKED TIMES A MILLION!!!!!! :D exams... BE GONE!!!!

you lil sore sour plum.. haaa go fk urself or get laid. maybe u will be happier then?

2010-01-25T23:12:00.002+08:00

6days..
coming 5days when it strikes 12 till bf comes HOME!!! (:
sorri for the lack of updates... but exams are realli killing my poor brain cells. im eating alot more than be4 n obviously im ballooning like a huffalump!! OMG!! still gyming though but mehh nt seeing any results :( pfftt

omg i cant even rmb when i last blogged!! TSK! whoever invented exams should die in a hole!! obviously he/she doesnt hav a social life!! PFFT. k a flashback to my weekend!!

friday 22nd jan
-skool as usual.. FKING LAST DAY!! we had a blasttt(:
-facial.. n straight to town to meet cherie baby!!! omg i miss my babygirl soooooo much!
-caught up n all.. then vanessa baby.. jollin n jh came!!
-wanton mee at fep... stone stone.. they left n me n vanessa baby headed to cine for FROLICK!! YUMYUM (shit craving nw!!!)
-i had 3 choices.. zirca/supper wif kerry baby.. boat quay or goodwood park hotel.. guess wad!!! i chose.. NONE!!!
-i headed home instead n gosh i nv felt happier to go home on a fri nite!!
-me n kerry decided nt to go anywhere n be good girls n stay hoem(: my fam was sooo shocked plss!

saturday 23rd jan
-morning call frm S.. hes dam cute "eh baby get up! ur gonna be late for skool!" me"baby its a saturday!" LOLs
-kerry baby came over at 12.30.. tantan under the nice hot sun(: we got tanner.. but it kinda faded after a while?
-had a pigg out day!! green tea ice-cream.. bagel crisps.. chee chong fun... n a WHOLE LOT of FRUITS!! YUMYUM
-impromptu plans to go wavehse!! she dragged my lazy ass out of the hse!!
-wavehse was SHIT!!! k maybe cuz by the time we got there.. everyone was either wasted.. gone.. passed out n went home!! we went around 12ish thinking its the "normal" partying time.. but NOPE!
-me n kerry left around 2ish... headed down to zirca jus to say hi to the bouncers.. oh we were in our bikini(wif a top over obviously!) n SANDALS!!!
-they all said "went wavehse huh!! GO BACK LA DUN COME BACK!!" LOLs funnaayyee
-we went into zirca wif sandals!! SANDALS OKAAYY!! my gawwdd we had a blasttt
-supper outside zirca again.. curry puff n prata!! YUMYUM(: it was the onli time kerry baby was actually happy the whole nite. LOL
-oh then kenneth gave me his 3 currypuffs n i took kerry's curry.. my lunch the next day!! heehee x)

k i promise a proper pic post soon!! once im over wif fking exams..
ps... my baby is finally coming home soon!! OMG OMG STOKED!! this sneaky boy has something planned up his sleeves n he refuse to tell me!!pfftt... suspicious sneaky boy of mine. ANTICIPATION for his arrival n wat he has got planned(:
i guessed he was gonna get me a kitten!! hahaahah! but he said.. NO!! pooper :(

2010-01-21T23:14:00.002+08:00

10 days...
hey peoople we are moving on to a single digit tmr!! YAY =D

ive been stuck at home since sunday!!!! OMG MIRACLE!! well besides gg to skool.. n then escape 1/2 way cause i feel tt im wasting my life staring at the lecturer when i can be home doing productive studying... YEPPERS!! i actually hav started studying!! i started stressing out n went a bit psycho at S.. (my poor boy had to take my shit all the way in brunei)

k so my daily routine so far has been...
home frm skool by 2... nap till 4.. wake up n study till 6... gym frm 6-7... rest.. 8 study again... 11 im done for the day!!

UHHUH!! im kinda used to all this. esp the gym part!! its like im addicted to the gym!! MUST go everyday if nt i will die!! heehee x) rock hard abs.. im on my wayyy!! (k la long way more but i can dream riteee!)

S hasnt called me since 1 :( my poor busy worn out soldier. aiyooooo... i will NV in a million yrs understand wat he realli is gg through. anyways last nite we had a nice heart to heart talk(: the reassurance we gave each other.. made me all warm n fuzzy. n im still falling head over heels for him(: if he was next to me i would squish him so tight(: hes jus such a sweetie ya noeeee! im jus so blessed n thankful to hav him in my life. though hes away nw... when he gets back he promised to make it up to me(:

anyways im making this clear... i wont be answering any questions on formspring abt me n my past anymore. i mean cmon people its been 5 fking mths!!! watever we both do in our lives is OUR business. so.. YEA!!!

goodbye!! gg down for a nite walk... then off to bed. studying realli kills ur brain i swear!! tmr am finally gg to see the world!! facial after skool.. n meeting yvonne baby in town then im gonna hav an early nite(: YES.. GO ME!! no clubbing till feb 5th when S comes back!!!! =D

2010-01-20T00:01:00.004+08:00

11 days left...

hav been sick again.. urgg dreading but yet loving it at the same time. ive got a love hate r/s wif my body. lols! plus i actually got down to studying these days... AND ive been gg faithfully to the gym since sunday until yesterday(tues!) YEPPERS! go fit me n lose weight me!! this is wat i do to keep myself busy till S comes back(: well im quite satisfied wif hw discipline i am wif the whole gymming thing. in the past it was soooo difficult to get my ass down to the gym n mind u its jus below my hse -.- nw i get my ass down there even when im sick like a dog!! heh x)

anyways this weekend would be studying AGAIN.. n kerry baby should be coming over on sat to chill n bake pie!! wheeee =D yepperss am STOKED! n nt forgetting my lose weight get fit plan at the gym!! ive made the gym my 2nd home already. LOLs

k am quite peeved n taken back by wats still gg around. k i dun get y people cant jus let go of wat people hav done in the past. i mean its the past rite? people learn n move on frm it. so if the person tt actually went through everything can let it go.. y cant random people out there let it go too? i mean cmon.. cut tt poor girl some slack ayyeee! its a mistake she aint proud of at all. wat bothers me is where the hell are all these shit coming frm!!? some people jus love to fk peoples lives up huh! well go get laid or something. maybe tt would make u feel better?? n maybe then u would stop talking rubbish!

im veri thankful for this babygirl of mine. who has stuck through everything wif me since last aug till nw. yes ive known her for a short period of time.. but shes been there wif me through thick n thin. through the emo drunk moments.. to the happy drunk moments. n nw tt im suffering frm major S withdrawal syndromes.. she texts me everyday to check tt im fine(: wat will i ever do without u baby!!!? u mean sooooo much to me n i love u to bits!!!

ps.. we both hav decided to go on a 'once a mth clubbing' plan!! so this weekend its.. BAKE A PIE DAY!! WHEEE =D

k boyfren has been doing well in brunei.. he woke me up in a veri scary way jus nw. yea freak me out alone. tskkkk!! i noe he will be fine.. but u noe.. paranoia of a gf? yeaaa!! hate this laaa :(

off to bed.. nursing a flu bug is nooooooo joke!! esp nw tt ive ran out of med... n S is away n cant get me any :( sighh depressing much!!?

2010-01-18T00:56:00.004+08:00

13 days..

http://formspring.me/foeshitzme
k go ahead n ask me anything(:

its late... im suppose to be sleeping but this stupid headache is killing me. ive been having this burning headache on n off these few days.. i swear its part of the withdrawal syndrome frm S.. LOVESICKNESS!!!

k byee! i missed S's call jus nw. nw im depressed... NITE!

ps.. he managed to get reception AGAIN in the jungle!! WHEEE =D but his fone is dying.. pfftt... no contact till tues i guess :(

[edited]
jus got a call frm S... im so miserable.. my headache isnt helping me at all. im losing my poor mind nw... hes been away frm me for 5 days.. i havnt seen or touched him in 5 days. well beggers cant be choosers.. at least i get to hear his voice n read his text msges. still missing him like crazy..

good nite!

2010-01-17T03:18:00.004+08:00

14 days...
2 weeks till you're back in my arms again...
listening to neyo's 'never knew i needed you'.. its me n S's song btw... my mind is filled wif images of me n you... all the memories we have created so far together... n i noe theres gonna be a whole lot more memories to create together.

i cant imagine im in a comfy cushiony bed n hes out in the jungle wif who noes wat in there. sighhh.. i miss him like crazy its nt funni at all... hes sleeping.. im typing this. im gg a bit crazy here!!!

k side track frm my bf... i jus realise ive got 2 weeks till exams. n all ive done for the past 12 weeks of skool is muck around. i hav nt touched my books or notes at all. yepperss im pretty much screwed!? FML times a million plssss!!! k im moving my ass downstairs my hse later to actually start on some productive studying!!! URG

k to motivate myself.. i shall list out events to look forward to in feb!!

cny shopping wif S((:maybe a short trip to bkk(my 1st time there!!!) reunion dinner.cny.valentines day.a visit to chinatown wif S.hardcore partying for the next 3 weeks of my life be4 uni starts... YEPPERS! k go me!!

2010-01-16T22:09:00.004+08:00

15 days...
ps.. ive got formspring !!! so go ahead n ask me anything!! dun worry i wont bite((:
http://formspring.me/foeshitzme

ive been so lazy to upload pics these days!! net too slow. anyways if ur on my fb... u should be updated by my pics on my profile so for the time being jus head over there to look at wat havoc ive been up to. LOLs

friday 15th jan
-skool as usual.. alot of funni moments. rosie posie makes us laugh i swear!!
-twin said "we gain abs!!" HAHAHA

-headed home.. then slept for a while.. woke up n change..
-me n kerry baby were budgeting (part of our SMS save money scheme) so we decided to take a train to newton!! TRAIN OKAYYY!! n we had many explicit convos on the train i think the people thoe we were weird. oh wellss!! WHO GIVES! i love my babygirl(:
-ivan picked us up newton mrt station... over to newton for dinner (YEA DAM BUDGET plsss!)
-bumped into inquisitive n he was wif DIPLO!! UHHUH!
-anyways we waited for elissa to come... went over to newton mrt to pick theo up.. ivan dropped us 4 at zirca
-S called(:
-the usuals when i get to zirca.. "where hav u been huh!! so long nv see u!" HAHAHA i felt so loved n missed when i saw the bouncers(:
-kenneth told me to buy redbull for everyone.. i refused!! then he said "i ban u!" LAMEEEE
-thxs to jimmy for the chivas.. we pretty much got high enough... LOLs
-kissdafunk was amazing!!!! (: didnt realli appreciate them when i was sober.. but when i was a tad bit high.. okay they were amazing!! LOL (maybe my ears were playing tricks wif me! haaa)

okay zirca has this "godfather" who rides a bicycle n sells currypuff, prata, nasi lemak, chicken wing n idk wad. the bouncers always get their mid nite snacks frm him. so last nite me n kerry baby decided to try out his food. n gosh we had a BLAST!! best supper ever after zirca!! LOL we ate prata n currypuff rite on the road outside zirca. unglam times a million but it was EPIC!! HAHAHA

nice nice ivan came to pick us up around 2.40? yea me n kery had a surprisingly early nite.. i was too tired anyways! normally we would stay till closing but last nite i wasnt in a partying mood so no point staying anyways...

pics are wif elissa.. would get them off her soon(:

oh oh u noe theres actually reception in brunei's jungle!! LIKE COOL LAAAA!!! so S managed to call me(: heehee... he was sitting by the fire.. so i said...

me: eh are u guys gonna sing camp fire songs?
S: wtf noooo!! army okaayy nt girl guides!
me: but realli wadd! HAHA if u tell ur guys ur gf said this.. i think they would piss themselves laughing! im so darn entertaining!!
S: no way am i gonna tell them!! LOLs
me: are u gonna eat toasted mashmellows!?
S: NOOOO!! u think wad? plus we dun hav mashmellows
me: aiya but i wannttt!!

HAHA!! my boyfren prolly thinks im a JOKE! LOLs!! but realli wad campfire must hav songs n mashmellows riteee!!? u noe the way he describes the jungle.. its like survivor!!! sleeping in hammocks or grass.. washing ur utensils in the stream... eating preserved process food!?

me: if u throw me in the jungle... i would die in 5mins!
S: yea i think so too!!

HAHAH!! kk la we entertain each other.. he almost sounds like tarzan!! heehee x) k BYEE!

2010-01-14T10:46:00.001+08:00

i show u something dam cool!!
some self entertainment in skool.. heehee x) i feel like a fish in a fish bowl!! CHEAP THRILLS!!

S is in the river swimming.. wif combat boots n his gears n all... MISS U!!

2010-01-13T22:42:00.002+08:00

day 1...

i woke up at 5am to go to the toilet... i checked my fone... 4.30am.. S texted me((: i smiled so wide cause at least i noe hes reached safely.

8.29am.. his name flashed on my screen.. it was a call frm brunei((: it was great to hear his voice after 7hrs... k so basically the whole day we texted each other wif onli a few hrs interval in between n all... it realli doesnt feel like hes away frm me. plus he called 3 times today. though i dun feel tt hes away... im still missing him like crazy. baby i love u so so much...

so i dragged my ass to skool cause i promised S i would be gg skool for the next 8 days no matter wad. stats killed me n twin... then it was town to get her jeans n my yoghurt. starbucks for 3 1/2 hrs rushing out our presentation. we almost killed each other wif our crankiness. but we had some good laughs along the way... the best one was our Chanel n ChanNel joke!! HAHAH! i told S n he laughed.

anyways my diet was an EPIC FAIL!!! ive been TRYING to pretend im living in the jungle like S too wif minimal food. but apparently today was a FAILURE!! k tmr i shall start again!!

S is gg to the river n swimming tmr. weather there aint tt good. paranoia n stress levels will increase frm 6am to 2pm tmr till i receive a text frm him n let me noe hes save. i miss u babyboy...

2010-01-12T22:26:00.002+08:00

the countdown begins..

till u are back in my arms again

k so S is leaving on a jungle adventure to brunei in 3hrs.. (hes prolly at the airport nw) i was suppose to send him off but jus the thot of having to see him walk through the departure gates jus killed me already. so i went over to his place n said bye there.

i kept smiling when he looked into my eyes.. i tried my veri best to stop those tears frm falling down. when he hugged me... i felt my heart dropping to the bottom of the ocean. it was heart wrenching. the final hug at his doorstep... i could feel my tears ready to burst out of my eye sockets.. i held it back wif every inch of energy i had. when i let him go n had my back against him.. the tears came rolling down.

ive been through many separations. but idk y this time seemed to hurt even more. k i noe y.. cause im fking in love wif him. yea hes onli gg away for 19 days but the thot of nt having him here in the same country as me sucks. ive been so used to his morning wake up calls n forcing me to get my ass to skool. for 19 days i think im gonna die n im sure to be late for skool for the last 8 days.

this short separation would test us... so in a way its good but yet torturing!!! :( well im gonna stay strong n nt cry anymore!! afterall hes my jungle warrior n i cant be a wuss riteee!

i always tell him.. "ur gonna be saving the country n im gonna turn into a skool nerd!" LOLs...

i miss him already... i jus cant wait till these painful 19days to be over n hes back!!! we hav sooooo many things to do when he comes back.. cny shopping.. ben's farewell.. zirca.. quality make up time!!! yepperss STOKED!

i love u baby... n im gonna be faithfully counting down on my fb.. twitter n blog till u come back! =D

2010-01-12T22:09:00.002+08:00

flashbackkk

sat 9th jan
-stay in day wif S((:
-he came over around 2ish 3... picked me up frm home n off we went to causeway point(ps i HATE heartland places on weekends. friggine crowded!!)
-lunch at some chinese place... duck duck. being wif him he makes me explore diff kinds of food. heh i likeeyy
-grocerry shopping at cold storage n gosh we had a BLAST!! lols he had to control me frm buying nonsense.. but ended up his hands started grabbing nonsense frm the shelf n putting it in the basket
-we chalked up a bill of 60bucks n its jus the 2 of us!! DIE la next time!
-went to buy 'marley n me' n 'i love u man'
-home... we baked a chocolate cake together cause i was craving((:
-watched 'i love u man' n we pissed ourselves laughing like crazzyyy!
-a nice homecooked meal.. then off we went to the pool to attempt to lose wat we ate. HAHAH
-heart to hearts in the jacuzzi wif random kids jumping here n there.. -.-
-home to shower.. off we went to meet shaun, ry, ben, darren, zx n chloe at parklane for l4d2!!!
-we all had a blast killing each other.. i had a blast killing my boyfren. HEH x) he calls me dangerous cause when im the zombie.. i attack him like crazzyyyy!
-around 2ish... went down to supperclub to check on kerry baby. she got me n S worried!
-macs supper wif S... then home(:

awesome nice chill day i had wif S. i can realli get used to this

mon 11th jan
-met S in town around 5ish... dinner... aimless walking
-decided to catch 'avatar' n i didnt get the start of the movie at all!! k i was DAM SLOW
-anywhos... we headed to hk cafe after at ion.. ate like some glutton.. peanut butter french toast is YUM! but dam gross after a while
-trained home... heart to hearts n got emo together

tues 12th jan
-S came to pick me up frm skool wif a bouquet of rose (blue rose mind u!!) n a necklace((:
-went to 'eighteen chefs' at northpoint n we had an amazing meal!!! GREAT pasta i tell u!
-i felt like a fatty.. so we walked... went to some dodgy barber to shave his head for his brunei trip
-home to jus spend some time together.. he left around 5
-i slept... woke up... headed over to his place
-we had a mini gift exchange. heh cutesieee(: glad he had a good laugh wif wat i wrote n wat i got him for his trip
-said goodbye to him there...

to be continued.. next post